[Music]
Hello friends welcome to this day in
Jack Benny I'm John Henderson this
episode is from October 17th
1943 it's a new era of the Jack Benny
show this is the second episode with
brand new writers the previous writers
Bill Maro and Ed bin left and were
replaced by by Sam parin Milt josephburg
George balser John tberry and Sai Howard
like the Jack Benny show most radio
shows were returning to the air after a
summer Hiatus the Red Skeleton
show thank you very much and good
evening ladies and gentlemen stay red I
saw a motorcycle cop chasing you
yesterday did he give you a ticket yeah
but I almost fcked him out of it when
suddenly he decided to put his foot on
the running board but red your car
hasn't got any running board no and the
cop hasn't got any teeth
either and now meet the people who live
in the Burn's house George and Gracie
last time you had the car you got a
ticket for parking in front of a
fireplug parking all I did was stop for
a wave and he gave me a ticket that does
seem unfair where did you stop for the W
and my regular beauty
shop Jack Benny's comedy adversary Fred
Allen was having an extended Hiatus for
health reasons so until the Fred Allen
Show would return in the New Year Jack
borrowed one of the characters from that
show Mrs nobal
no ah Mrs nbow during his summer Hiatus
Jack Benny was on tour with the Uso
entertaining the troops overseas in this
episode they do a public service
announcement for whack the women's Army
Corps women of all Races all Creeds
American women today they are joining
the whack BVD were a brand of men's
underwear a light shirt and shorts named
after the founders Bradley Vorhees and
day it's like traveling through Alaska
in your
BVD one of the most famous films of all
time cassablanca was released at the
beginning of this year it starred
Humphrey Bogart as Rick Blain and ingred
Bergman as ilsa Lund boss yeah boss
ain't you going to bed all right now
wait waiting for a
lady I know she's coming
back of all the Gin joints and all the
towns in all the
world she walks into mine what's that
your plan or just a little something on
my own I'll stop it you know what I want
to hear play it for me you must remember
this A Kiss is Just a Kiss a size just a
sign I wasn't sure you were this same
let's see the last time we met was
laella
Ro how nice you
remembered if you enjoy this podcast
share it with a friend and take a moment
to give it a five-star rating and review
on Apple podcasts and enjoy the show The
Grape nuts and grape nuts flakes program
coming to you from New York City and
starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston
Phil Harris Dennis day Rochester and
yours Tru Le Don Wilson
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
back in the dear dead days when folks
put on Long linen dusters to go
scorching over the roads in a brand new
Horseless Carriage yes way back then
delicious Molly rich grape nuts were
making a hit at American breakfast
tables and they've been making a hit
ever since today you can enjoy that one
delicious flavor in two delicious forms
grape nuts crispy crunchy kernels and
grape nuts flakes delicate toasty Brown
flakes both have a mly rich sweet as a
nut goodness that's absolutely
distinctive a flavor with punch and zest
that makes breakfast a high spot of the
day and grape nuts and grape nuts flakes
are both basic seven foods or they
Supply All Around whole grain
nourishment our government wants us to
eat more of such cereals for they're
plentiful not rationed and they help to
take the place of scarcer foods so for
real energy-giving nourishment plus Rich
unusual flavor flavor and texture make
it grape nuts or grape nuts flakes in
the morning every morning
[Music]
and Now ladies and gentlemen say Mary uh
Mary are you sure it's all right
certainly isn't it Phil sure go ahead
Don okay and Now ladies and gentlemen
for the second broadcast of the Season
we bring you the first lady of grape
nuts Miss Mary Livingston
thank you thank you hello again this is
Mary talking and Don the reason I asked
you to introduce me is because Jack's
out in the hall talking to his new
writers his writers not so loud Don not
so loud you know people think I had
lived this stuff here you know I'm one
of them spontaneous
men I'm sorry Phil say Mary uh how's
Jackson since he got home oh Phil it's
simply awful since since he got back
from North Africa that's all he talks
about he absolutely drives you nuts are
you kidding kidding you want to know
something Jack's a bigger ham now than
he was before he left no no no no no
don't do that for me I got to wipe a
baby maybe
do no it's it's the truth fellas this
military stuff has really gotten into
Jack's system gosh how he'd love to be a
general what a guy I can't understand
Jack wanting to be a soldier wasn't he
in the Navy in the last war yeah but he
was in the Army the war before
that oh and there's one thing I got to
tell you kids you'll never believe
[Laughter]
this what is it Barry yeah tell us
oh oh it's so fantastic well then go
ahead tell us what is it well yesterday
morning while Jack was shaving he cut
his cheek
yeah and ever since then he's been
calling himself old blood and
[Music]
gut oh he's impossible 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4
that's Jack now out in the hall
1 2 3 4 what you doing drilling either
that or counting his
hair who knows he Mary do you think I
ought to go out and get Jack away from
his boys no I'll go and I hope he's
forgotten about his African
campaign
four
four four writers
H present
pencils a fine bunch of comedy writers
recruits from the Allen
program rookies every one of you just
look at you balls are pulling your
typewriter yes sir and josephburg your
pencil look at that point that's my head
sir
I mean the one with the Eraser on
it and tackleberry where's Howard he
went awl to Red Skeleton sir he did E
now listen men this is no picnic you
know you got a job to do and I'm going
to see that you do it and you look at
you with your hair hanging down in your
face I never had that trouble with Bill
marrow but sir wasn't he
[Music]
bald that's beside the point that's my
head sir
and I had another writer with me for
eight years Eddie Balo do you know where
he is now in the sanitarium
sir now cut that out Bower all right man
you can go downstairs to your room now
right next week's program yes sir about
face
forward
March hey look out for that window
[Music]
[Laughter]
well well I guess they're all right darn
it oh boy 35 weeks of this well it
serves you right oh hello Mary if You'
stop acting like a top Sergeant in the
movies you wouldn't have so much trouble
now come on in Jack the program's half
over okay well here he is fellas hello
Jack we've been waiting for you hi
Jackson that ease
man uh shall we line up for inspection
not now uh play fill you see Mary I have
to discipline the boys that's the
important
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
la
[Music]
la
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
yes
sir that was people will say we're in
love played by Phil Harrison Orchestra
and Now ladies and gentlemen hey Jackson
uh Mary tells us you've gone military
since you got back from Africa what's
the idea what do you mean well she says
the Army life has gone to your head oh
that's ridiculous ridiculous didn't you
try to buy an officer's uniform with two
pair of
shoulders Mary Mary was just a buck
private uniform and I had a hard time
finding one well let's go into a lot of
trouble just to getting the movies for
half price bub
Phil uh Phil gags like that put you in
Fred Allen's class and he's not working
right anyway as long as you brought it
up you know as long as you brought it up
the part of the army I'm interested in
is the aircore there you are fellas I am
I'm really am I'm interested in the airc
last night he brought down six flies
with a spray gun so now he an
AG I brought down seven and three
probables if you're getting out communic
sister get them
right and Now ladies and gentlemen for
our come
in yes hello Mr Benny remember me from
last week I'm the cab driver that
brought you into the airport oh yes yes
certainly yeah your name is Crowley
yes yes I remember you have a brother
over in North Africa yeah Joseph corpal
yes oh of course certainly Corel Crowley
yeah I can't understand you're not
running into him he was in Africa at the
same time you were well look buddy buddy
I told you last week you know I I saw so
many soldiers I mean how would I know
your brother well a couple of months ago
we got into a debate with an MP and lost
three front teeth well it just so
happened that every Soldier I saw had
all his front teeth then you probably
seen Joe he had a bridge put
in uh look Mr Crowley I know how you
feel I mean you've got a brother who's a
Corporal in the Army and you're proud of
them I'm proud of him too I mean but how
could I pick out among thousands and
thousands of men well they stength board
did look Mr Crowley look look look I
know but you got look we've got a
program to do I'll talk to you later
just take a chair and sit down over
there will you okay thank you you know
Mary he's a nice guy and I can
understand how he feels but what can I
do what's that my writers they finally
thought of a
joke no no fell
no one of them didn't like it
[Music]
he will next time you said it you know
Mary guys like that you know hello
Dennis hello Mr
[Applause]
Benny well well how are you kid fine sir
Dennis you don't have to salute me in
the
studio yes sir and you don't have to
call me sir yes ma'am
Dennis look just act natural you see but
don't overdo it you know okay say Mr
Benny you must have a very funny program
as I was coming in I heard people
laughing and screaming well that wasn't
the audience Dennis that was my writers
well they're people aren't they miss
Livingston I'm not so sure about the one
that's got his ears tied in a bow Mar he
has to tie them there's a bobby pin
shortage anyway say Mr Benny do you
think you can get one of your writers to
relieve me this evening well relieve you
what Dennis I'm on Sentry Duty in front
of Mr Benny's room every
night Dennis it's just until isn't that
awful well listen kid you don't have to
stand there all night when Jackson goes
to sleep why don't you beat it oh I
don't dare he's got his bed pushed up to
the door and he keeps peeking at me
through the
keyhole dan stop exaggerating will you
and let's have your song okay see You'
think that the C his knuckles a lot
funny it didn't hear
him who my brother corpal Crowley look
you told me about his knuckles last week
now look at Crowley won't you
please hey those writers are really on
the beam I'm going down and see what
gags they've dreamed up excuse me kid
what all right Dennis while Jack's gone
you might as well do your song okay Miss
Livingston oh hold on a minute I'll take
it hello hello miss limson this
[Applause]
Rochester hello Rochester how are you
I'm fine thanks how are you Miss lyston
oh I'm all right that's good can I speak
to Old Blood and Guts
uh you mean Mr Benny that's what they
call him before he cut
himself Rochester has he been giving you
that military stuff too has he you won't
let me out of the hotel room without a
3-day
[Music]
pass you know what else Miss lyston what
he made me sew four stars on his knife
gown and a service stripe on his
[Music]
bbds well that's a simp silliest thing I
ever heard of so
far well Rochester Mr Benny just stepped
out but I'll tell him you called thanks
M Livingston I'll be right over to pick
him up goodbye goodbye now let's see
where did I put my
helmet a service stripe on his
bvds okay kids hey let's get on with the
show say Jack what were your writers
laughing about did they think up some
good gags for you no they were listening
to a record of Burns and
Allen Sing Down that's a fine bunch of
guys I've got say he does look funny
with his ears tied in a bow with that
you know he really
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
does how
sweet you
are how
sweet you are
how
dear your tenderly smiling
face through
days all bitter and
gray
and through
night when even the
stars are de
[Music]
how
sweet to
know my
heart can
glow from just the warmth of our first
embrace
our are Lovel World by far
when
I
remember how
sweet you
[Applause]
are how sweet to
know my heart can glow from just the war
of our first
[Music]
Embrace w
[Music]
when
I
remember when I
remember how
[Laughter]
sweet you
[Applause]
very good very good that was how sweet
you are from that Sensational film thank
your lucky stars presented by the famous
Warner Brother
and made by that talented and lovable
producer Mark helinger making a happy
combination Jack what are you worried
about you're sign for your next
picture oh yes and sung by Dennis
day that's right I'm sorry that's right
ladies and gentlemen sung by Dennis day
that lovable tenor with the golden boys
thanks and do you good folks know why
Dennis has such a sweet and golden boys
no
why because he eats grape nuts and grape
nuts flakes thereby enjoying one
delicious flavor in two distinctive
forms isn't that right Dennis yes grape
nuts are so crunchy and the flakes they
are so munchy that I always eat a Bunchy
for my breakfast and my lunch e
uh Dennis uh Dennis how about how about
dinner thanks are you sure I won't be
intruding no you won and bring your own
grape nuts and now folks for our feature
come in Mr Benny yes Brown's the name
John Brown I'm a reporter for the
Associated Press they sent me over here
to get an interview well I'm always glad
to see the gentleman of the press great
bunch of boys don't give me that jump I
hate this as much as you love
it uh well Mr Brown I want a story and
you need publicity so stop talking well
look Mr Brown I got to make a deadline
and you want to see your puss in
print well Mr Brown now tell me about
your trip where did you go what did you
do well uh to tell you the truth fellow
I I don't want to brag but you will you
will
no no Mr Brown I'm not bragging at all I
was in central Africa Cairo the Persian
Gulf yes yes I was also in Sicily Italy
were you in Tripoli yes
Casablanca what did you say
mister I said were you in
Casablanca was I in
casablanka let me tell you a story Mr
Brown
come
closer this will be
interesting very
interesting Pasa Blanca in
1939 across the Mediterranean to Oran
then by train or camel or foot across
the rim of Africa to Casablanca in
French
Morocco where some men sell their souls
for a passport but others wait and wait
and
wait Casablanca the crossroads of the
world the scene is Ricky Bogart's
nightclub where the
high the low the fallen and the mighty
gather to see this man of mystery
Ricky closing up for the night Mr Ricky
better come home with me you've had
enough to drink no Sam I want to stay
here and
Brew I want to brood Sam what are you
brooding about you know what it is it's
her Sam
ingred when we split up in Paris she
left
me she left me Sam left me a sad and
broken down old man that's the way she
found you
boy Oh ingred ingred I thought I'd
gotten you out of my mind but you come
back like a ghost haunting me haunting
me but I won't take you back see I won't
do
it if Humphrey Bogart's listening it
doesn't get any
better Sam Sam play that song for me
again will you K what's the use Mr Ricky
it only brings back memories I don't
care play it say my brother was in Caza
planket maybe a saw him there look
Crowley Crowley not
now I'm having trouble with a girl just
sit down Crowley sit down pour yourself
a drink with you okay thanks ingred
ingred go ahead Sam play that song I
want to hear it once
more you must remember
this a kiss is still a kiss a side
L Sam singer
boy the fundamental things apply as time
goes by as the time goes by sing it boy
and when two lovers wo they still say I
love you
[Music]
oh the foundamental thing
apply as
goes as time goes
by what a
song What A song Sam it tortures me it
tortures me but I love it here Crowley
cwy have another drink sing it Sam sing
Moonlight and love songs Never out of
day it's full of passion jealousy and
hate one my need
man and man must have his
M no one
[Music]
can at a boy
Crowley say
Crowley Crowley haven't you got a
brother up here
[Music]
and haven't you got a brother up here in
North Africa yeah how did you
know I met his brother New York he's a
cab driver never heard of
him me neither Sling It Sam sing that
song that keeps breaking my heart see
you must remember this a kiss is
still Mr Ricky Mr Ricky look what is it
say look in the doorway it's her it's
her
ingr my Ingram your master
a kiss still a kiss a just
[Applause]
a ingred my darling Ricky in and you
came back to me the
fundamental T up
fly and
[Applause]
I'm and you you Mr Brown you asked me if
I was ever in
Casablanca play Phil
[Music]
friends I'd like to take just a moment
to tell you something about the
wax they're making a tremendous
contribution to Victory I know their
spirit and courage their immense pride
in their jobs and they have a right to
be proud the trouble is there aren't
enough of them to do all the things that
need doing so won't you give some
serious thought to joining up The Wack
uniform is a mark of rare distinction
it's the uniform of the greatest army in
the world now maybe you don't realize
this but there are 155 different kinds
of jobs open right now in The Wack well
out of 155 jobs you can certainly find
one that will suit your own special
abilities so think it over you can go to
your local wack recruiting station and
get all the details you know every woman
who joins the wax helps to bring Victory
closer helps to bring our American boys
back home quicker and that's something
we all want to
do remember the old fashioned way of
learning the alphabet A is for apple b
is for books well today it's different A
is for adequate B is for breakfast and G
is for grape nuts and grape nuts Flakes
two grand cereals for your adequate
breakfast you know nutrition experts
tell us breakfast is the most important
meal of the day and at that time we
should get at least one quarter of our
entire day's nourishment and what's more
they say a cereal supplying whole grain
nourishment is a must in the adequate
breakfast well you can't do better than
choose grape nuts or grape nuts flakes
they taste so good moldy rich and sweet
as a nut and grape nuts and grape nuts
flakes both bring you whole grain food
values so there in one swell tempting
treat you're getting a wonderful start
on your day's nourishment needs grape
nuts and grape nuts flakes are thrifty
plentiful not ration better make them a
breakfast time habit at your house grape
nuts grape nuts flakes we're a little
late so good night folks thank
[Applause]
you hot grap nut sweet meal there's a
treat as is a treat try a bowl of this
rousing Rich hot brown cereal and you'll
say it's the best ever as a gloriously
smooth full body texture as the rich
goodness of roasted whole wheat as the
grand whole grain nourishment and grap
nuts wheat meal hooks to perfection in
just 3 minutes that's hot grape nuts
sweet
meal this program came to you from New
York this is the National Broadcasting
Company