[Music]
Hello friends welcome to this day in
Jack Benny I'm John Henderson this
episode is from April 29th
1945 World War II was expected to end at
any time with Hitler's Germany on the
brink of
surrender stock Home unconfirmed a spat
to say that Hitler died at noon today is
underground Berlin headquarters the
report is not official
London count Bernardi of Sweden is back
in Denmark for another comab on hindler
surrender turns our turns briefly are no
dice no handshake just stick them up
meanwhile the United Nations was holding
a conference in San
Francisco San Francisco California a
momentous conference begins just before
the second day session the conference
presents a pageant of Nations banded
together to make peace civilians at home
could still only buy certain items if
they had the proper ration stamps this
is a typical page of blue stamps in war
ration Book 2 notice that the stamps are
given point numbers 85 2 1 everyone will
get 48 Points each period that means you
will use blue stamps ABC for the first
period DF for the second and so forth in
this episode they mention the comedian
Bob Hope
and it was in 1944 that Bob's book I
never left home came out and Bob was
acclaimed as a famous author after
reading I never left home One reviewer
was so impressed he telephoned Bob and
said Mr hope I can only say that I am
proud and deeply gratified that the
author of such a book is a native of Los
Angeles well thanks which paper you wi
New York
Times in this episode they mentioned
some popular music Raman
Coca-Cola for the Y doar
and my dreams are getting better all the
[Music]
time be
sh my dreams are get better all the
time Forever Amber was an adult novel
and it seemed like there were endless
Youth Novels like Beverly gray girl
reporter or ELC Dinsmore a children's
novel series from the late
1800s well I I know it sounds a little
well a little Elsie Dinsmore but it's
true there was also a youth novel series
for boys called the Rover boys but if
you wanted Real Life Adventure there was
the animal Trapper Frank Buck all I had
was a ball of twine but that gave me an
idea on the big screen you could see the
beautiful singing actress Lena horn love
can be a moment's Madness love can be
insane Jack Benny's neighbor on the show
was the actor Ronald Coleman her beauty
is is a fragile thing that can only live
where fragile things are loved Jack
Benny himself along with his violin
could be seen on the cover of look
Magazine with the featured article he
has to be loved Jack put down his violin
and picked up a trumpet for his new
movie the horn blows at midnight but
fellas please if I must have an
occupation down here like you said
couldn't it be something that I know
something about as for instance what
well I do play a pretty good trumpet and
finally if caffeinated drinks like
coffee keep you up at night you might
want to try oval team so why not change
to oval te starting tonight take a
moment to give this podcast a five-star
rating and review and enjoy the show The
Jack Benny Program quality of product is
essential to continuing
success Lucky Strike means fine tobacco
so round so firm so fully packed
so free and easy on the
draw LS mft LS mft LS mft sure thing
that's right Lucky Strike means fine
tobacco so round so firm so fully packed
so free and easy on the
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fine tobacco to make a fine cigarette
and independent tobacco experts present
at the auctions can see the makers of
Lucky Strike consistently select and buy
the finer the lighter the naturally
milder Lucky Strike tobacco yes Lucky
Strike means fine tobacco so smoke that
smoke of fine tobacco Lucky
[Music]
[Applause]
Strike the Lucky Strike program starring
Jack Benny with Mery living Phil Harris
Rochester Larry Stevens and yours truly
Don
Wilson and now let's go out to Beverly
Hills to Jack Benny's house where we
find our star of stage screen and radio
relaxing in the library
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
GE it's nice to have a few hours to
yourself with nothing to do I think I'll
read a
book see there's some good ones on this
shelf for here here's one gertude
Eichelberger girl
plumber oh I read that one gosh it was
touching I'll never forget the that part
where gerud tenderly picked up a monkey
wrench and bashed her husband's head
in but he had it coming to him imagine
heating his beer with her soldering
[Music]
iron maybe there's another book I oh
here are some the Rover Boys on a
marshmallow
hunt nah I'm too old for that
Elsie dinsmore's first
Petticoat H pictures
[Music]
too nah I'm too old for
that Forever Amber nah I'm
h no picture this book's on the wrong
shelf here I better put it over here
wait a minute there's a book missing oh
yes I remember Ronald Coleman took that
one two weeks ago two weeks say that
little book is going to pay for itself
in no
[Music]
time oh here's one I haven't read I
never left
home must be by one of those new French
authors Bob h
[Music]
pay well I'm not in the mood now so
maybe I say here's a book I never saw
before let's see my diary by Rochester
van
Jones oh what do you know it's
Rochester's diary I think I'll take a
look and see if no I better not oh I'll
just read a little bit it can't
hurt dear diary I take my Pen in Hand to
tell you the little secrets that dwell
in my heart isn't that
cute let me see March 8th dear diary
last night I went to another meeting of
the Central Avenue roll out the barrel
and dice
[Music]
Club I told Mr Benny I was going to a
lecture on meteorological
phenomena h a lecture on meteorological
phenomena look how he spelled lecture
[Music]
let's see April 2nd dear diary two
nights ago I dreamed that Lena horn fell
madly in love with me last night I
dreamed she threw her arms around my
neck and kissed me right now I'm
drinking Ovaltine as my dreams are
getting better all the time
[Music]
April 5th dear diary Mr Benny is one of
the kindest most considerate most
generous bosses I ever had well and he
never gets mad when I ask him for a
raise I know this because I've asked him
thousands of
[Music]
times well I've always believed in free
speech I guess I've read enough of Roch
wow look at the list of girls names and
phone numbers he's got on the last page
flossy Brown Jefferson
2957 Ethel John oh oh here he comes I
better jump up on the table and put his
diary on the top
shelf now you'll never suspect that I've
read oh boss what do you doing up on the
table huh oh oh oh there's a mosquito in
the room a mosquito last time I caught
you up on a table it was a
mouse where did you ever see me hide
from a mouse the night you made me send
for Frank
book Rochester what did you come in here
for anyway your violent teacher called
and said it'd be a few minutes late oh
Professor LeBlanc yeah he's going to
give me a lesson today oh well if that's
the case can I have the day off why I
want to go to a lecture on
meteorological phenomena
[Music]
Rochester you've been there once well
this time I'm going to try to get
[Music]
even I thought so well you can't go okay
then I better call my girl flossy Brown
and tell her I can't meet her after the
lecture let's see what's her phone
number again uh uh Jefferson
2957 B you saw that in my diary no no I
didn't Rochester I I guessed it guessed
it yes you know boss it's possible to
guess Jefferson 2 and with a little
effort you can guess Jefferson 29
Rochester and under extreme coincidental
and un unusual conditions you may even
guess Jefferson 295 Rochester but when
you guess Jefferson
2957 that's another meteorological
phenomenon all right all right Rochester
I accidentally came across your diary
and by the way thanks for saying all
those nice things about me you're
absolutely right I don't mind how many
times you ask for a raise you can ask me
for a raise anytime you want I I know
boss I know but repetition ain't doing
for me what it's doing for
lsmft well don't worry maybe someday
you'll oh that must be my music teacher
I'll get
it hello Jack oh it's you Mary come on
in say Jack here's a copy of look
magazine and it's got your picture on
the cover look magazine let me see see
that oh gosh look at me in a full dress
suit playing my violin say Mary I'd like
to keep this magazine how much does it
cost nothing this week they're giving
them
[Music]
away they are not there it is right on
top 10 cents and look there's a story
about me
inside see it's about my career in Show
Business oh yeah oh For Heaven's Sake
look at this misprint says I played the
Orum theater here in 1867
[Music]
isn't that ridiculous yeah it was the
[Music]
Pantages now look here's a picture taken
when I was in the third grade that's me
in the corner I should have known look
at that dunce cap on you Mary that's not
a dunce cap I had a very high
forehead D cap well if that's your head
you must have got your haircut with a
pencil
sharpener pencil Cher pencil Cher it's a
very nice picture of me on the cover oh
Rochester yes booss take this magazine
out and pin it on the bulletin board in
front of the house yes sir shall I put
it above or below the reviews on the
horn blows at
midnight put it right next to them and
while you're out there throw those rocks
back off the
[Music]
lawn jealous bunch of actors
there oh Mr Benny I meant to tell you
your music teacher Professor LeBlanc is
waiting for you in the den profess Blanc
I didn't hear him come in say Jack is
that the same violin teacher you had
last year no no Mary he gave me three
lessons and was drafted boss he gave you
three lessons and
enlisted never mind Mary I got to go on
the den and take my violin lesson see
you
later that's funny told me he was
drafted I never could understand that
[Music]
oh my king bird was
whistling a
sral
tune and I didn't know enough to come in
out of the Moon
[Music]
was taken for a Sligh ride in
[Music]
Ju oh I must have been a set up for
[Music]
a mocking bird was
whistling a
sental tune and I didn't know enough to
come in out of the
moon
like
so the big
romance was only make be
just a sleigh ride on a bomy
[Music]
Sumer my dreams were safe all
win and then to think that
I was
taken
for a slay ride
in
[Applause]
[Music]
J that was Larry Stevens singing slay
ride in July and now back to Jack
Benny's house where we find Jack taking
violin lessons
[Music]
no no M Ben no did I do something wrong
Professor no no M Ben Perhaps it is my
fault but do you mind if I tell you
something no no of course not after all
you're the teacher and you probably know
more about the violin than I do thank
you now M Benny you are holding in your
hand a very delicate instrument uh-huh
the music from the violin is like the
singing of the Angels like the murmur of
the breeze like the rling of the brook
now
[Music]
play gee it does sound like that doesn't
it perhaps if you H the violin upside
down but Professor I can't play that way
let's try
[Music]
anything but Professor I don't think I'm
good enough to do tricks
yet very well we will try it again and
this time I will help you I will count
off okay ready 1
2 raise your little finger higher
keep your nose up off the
ging a little softer while you're
learning not so loud my stoic
[Music]
turning hold your boso Strokes are ller
they should make you play for
[Music]
Hitler m m the violin is an instrument
that is supposed to soothe you to calm
you to make you relax to settle your
nerves the singing of the Angels the
murmuring of the breeze the Rippling of
the BR professor professor forgive me m
I lost my temper oh I wish it was my
[Music]
hearing what never mind never mind we
will proceed with the next lesson
intermo intermo that's what I like that
classical stuff
proceed please thank
[Music]
you no no M Benny you must not
go you must
go oh oh I see what you mean
[Music]
is that what you want M Ben you must
deedle on your
feedle oh oh CC
[Music]
CC hi Jackson what are you doing with
that oh no no no it's spring Jackson The
Little Birdies can't take
that Phil stop butting in I'm taking a
violin lesson well who's the character
with a silly mustache Phil please I am
Professor Andre LeBlanc M Ben music
teacher hi Andy what do you hear from
patrill Professor this is Phil Harris my
orchestra leader hi fellow artist I
greet
you funny you didn't do that when I came
in well it's just a friend greeting
Jackson they do that all the time oh
well Phil sit down while I finish my
lesson will you okay now m b continue
with
[Music]
intermo M Ben M Ben you are playing much
too loud can't you play a little softer
do you have a mute no but I can put a
glove on my left
hand why don't you throw a wet towel
over the string Now fail please please
please Mr Harris I am trying to teach Mr
Benny something and you are driving me
nuts too you said I'll be quiet B will
[Music]
you holy smoke to think a cat had to die
for
this what what what now what there was a
phone call for you for me yeah it was a
complaint that you're playing too loud
and it's very disturbing who phone one
of the neighbors no the San Francisco go
conference stop making things up I'm
sorry Professor well never mind for
today the lesson is over through finish
Kut I will see you next week oh well
okay Professor but tell me do you think
you can make a great violinist out of me
well I think I can do something for you
but it will take time how old are you
why how much time have we got left
[Music]
now wait a minute
Professor
I I know you're a great teacher but if
you don't like the way I play the violin
why did you take the job I am working
for that yane
dollar oh well you ain't going to get it
around here
roest you keep out of this well I'll see
you next week Professor goodbye goodbye
M Ben 24 years and all he knows
is hey if I wasn't so hungry I wouldn't
come back
now Phil please go in the other room
with Mary will yall want to practice a
little more say Jackson what's come over
you all of a sudden practicing the
violin and taking lessons and everything
nothing nothing I just want to get rusty
that's all oh no you got something up
your sleeve now what is I have nothing
up my sleeve now get out of here and let
me practice or I'll put you out you put
me out yeah let's see you do it okay
Jackson I'll go I'll go quiet
[Music]
oh oh hello Jack hello oh hello Don
Hello I'm praon
[Music]
one and two and three and four I will
practice this some
more you are getting better Jacko Lucky
Strike means fine
tobacco let me practice one and two and
three and four so free and easy on the
drawer Don let me practice this will you
cut it off Lucky Strikes they are for me
and so is
lsmft God D I'm
practicing now D why
don't D why don't you oh my goodness
look what time it is hey kids kids I got
to be leaving I've got an appointment
where you going Jack oh just out for a
little walk I'll be back I knew you had
something up your sleeve I haven't got
anything up my sleeve can a man have an
appointment I got to run along I'll see
you later what are you taking your
violin with you for I'm taking it by the
music store to have it fixed now so long
fellas I'll see you
later say
say Phil it's it's been quite a while I
I wonder where he went well I don't know
Don I'm sure and he took his violin with
him do you believe what he said about
taking it by the music store to have it
fixed now the way he plays that thing
how could he tell if it was
busted yeah I guess you're right maybe
he had an appointment with his dentist
no he could have sent those
yeah well I guess we'll just have to
wait till he gets home yeah yeah would
you like to play some Jin Ry Mary no I
don't think so I'm a little tired of Jin
howd you like shoot little crabs
kid oh don't be silly Phil let's listen
to the radio okay I'll turn it
on and now ladies once again I bring you
the latest news on rationing on August
1st a new shoe stamp becomes valid uh
this stamp should not be confused with
stamps X Y and G which become valid
August 5th whereas the new shoe stamp
becomes valid August 1st which is 2 days
after stamps mln o expire this leaves
you stamps hi I and W which are blue and
are not to be confused with the red
stamps which are QR and
J these stamps are to be used to buy but
then your grocery doesn't have any and
they will no doubt expire before he gets
some however your red stamps which are
called meat stamps should be used to
purchase butter in limited quantities
unless you prefer margarine in which
case you use stamps c h and E which
become valid after a and Y become void
before ft and H become
valid Now ladies if you have copied this
information down and understand it
please send it to me as I am all balled
up address your letters to all balded up
in care of the station to which you are
listening I'll get something else Phil
okay ladies and gentlemen
[Music]
are you a Los Angeles pedestrian are you
suffering from bumper
fatigue does your head Rank and when you
answer it is it a wrong number it is
then you've got static in your
attic so why not try sympathy soothing
sir and here's good news for people who
can't sleep just mix two drops of
sympathy soothing syrup with one quart
of
in drink down this Pleasant mixture and
when you go to bed pull the cork up over
you but remember use only sympathy
soothing syrup simpathy spelled
backwards is yamus YH t a p m y s yamus
Yus gamus R your Blues Away
and Now ladies and gentlemen a few weeks
ago we got a letter from a man who was
greatly helped by sympathy soothing
syrup and we have asked that man to come
here tonight and tell you his own story
and what is your name sir Jack
Benny Phil Phil did you hear that yeah
so that's where he went huh and Mr Benny
what is your profession I'm a violinist
and it just happens that I brought along
my violin and I'd like to now Mr Benny
how long ago did you start taking our
product about 6 months ago and at that
time I was very weak and run down in
fact I used to get tired out from
brushing my
teeth but after using three bottles of
your sympathy soothing syrup I can now
brush my teeth without changing
[Music]
hands and now I'd like to play my ladies
and gentlemen 6 months ago this man was
an emaciated dried up little weakling a
sickly scrawny
n a hollow shell without ambition or
courage a spineless little jerk now wait
a minute and I wish you could see him
now standing here straight and Tall the
bloom of Health in his cheeks and his
body bulging with muscles me yes ladies
and gentlemen this man who six months
ago was a sickly scrawny that's enough
already would you please let me play My
Benny we want to thank you for coming up
here tonight and hope you will continue
to enjoy such excellent heal thank you
Mr sympathy now I have a little
selection that I that concludes the
interview and Now ladies and gentlemen a
word on behalf of my tonight folks I'm
going to play get away from that
microphone it's a very short number I
will you please stop I have a commercial
to do with but you told me if I came up
here I could play I did not now here
take this bottle of simpy soothing syrup
and go you promise me the large time I
promise you nothing please ladies and
gentlemen do you suffer from get away
from that
microphone ladies and gentlemen do you
suffer from goopy Highland do you we you
have Snipes in your pipes you do then
why not try some s
foring remember s for spell backward
ladies and gentlemen the news of
Germany's collapse is bound to break any
day now and we will have cause for deep
gratitude to our fighting men over there
but for thousands of other fighters in
the Pacific the day will be simply
another day on which to fight perhaps on
which to die the news of their comrades
victory in Europe will naturally raise
their spirits but we here at home can
show our thanks by continuing our
Homefront efforts for the victory yet to
be won in the
Pacific we can prove to them that we
will celebrate Germany's Surrender by
rededicating ourselves to the support of
all wartime activities and giving them
all we have for an early defeat of Japan
thank
you Zach we'll be back in just a minute
but first here is my good friend la
speed
[Applause]
ring quality of product is essential to
continuing success and Lucky Strike
means fine tobacco yes Lucky Strike
means fine tobacco the finer the lighter
the naturally milder Lucky Strike
tobacco so for your own real deep down
smoking enjoyment smoke that smoke of
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the draw the famous tobacco auctioneers
heard on tonight's programmer Mr LA
Speed Rigs of Goldsboro North
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Kentucky American and this is basil
risdale LS mft LS mft LS mft There's
real deep down smoking enjoyment in
Lucky Strike for Lucky Strike means fine
tobacco yes Lucky Strike means fine
[Music]
tobacco hey kids I'm back where were you
jack yeah Jackson what was the big
secret well if you must know I made a
guest appearance on a very high class
program you did yes and kids I want to
tell you that I was absolutely a
sensation I played a violin solo they
made me take four enors imagine four
enors Jack what we heard that program
oh wasn't it lousy good
night this is the National Broadcasting
Company