[Music]
Hello friends welcome to this day in
Jack Benny I'm John Henderson this
episode is from March 29th
1936 at this time they're broadcasting
from New York at a number of New York
nightclubs young women were employed to
dance with young men at 10 cents a dance
a guest well I'm a guest 10 cents
worth on the big screen you could watch
Fred a dare and Ginger Rogers
[Music]
dance or you could see Shirley Temple
thank you ever so much may West and I'm
supposed to be a smart Dame that knows
all the answers Carol Lumbard why take
chances Clark Gable M honey you look out
comedian Harold Lloyd played a Milkman
in his new movie The Milky Way well
thank you very much thanks a lot goodbye
and Bella Losi reprised his role as
Dracula in Mark of the vampire watch out
they may be hovering over you a couple
years earlier they made a movie version
of the Victor Hugo novel L miserab my
name is Ja I am the new inspector of
police assigned to this District a
couple of popular singers of the day
were Lanny
Ross wished on the
moon for something I never
knew and Bing
[Music]
Crosby on the radio you could hear
comedian Fred Allen this is before his
Feud with Jack Benny the Town Hall
Amateur contest Here Comes Fred Allen
leading a new group of hopeful amateurs
about to be air tested in their first
appearance in the entertainment field
your applause after each Act will be
recorded on our Applause machine and the
two acts receiving the highest Applause
ratings will be called back later so
that you may select your final first and
second prize winner or you could listen
to the mystery program crime Clues based
on the crime Club novels you know crime
Clues are you a puzzle fan you like
brain Twisters well then here's your
chance all the necessary Clues will be
found hidden somewhere in tonight's
mystery so match your wits with a
Manhunter and see how good a sleth you
are Jack Benny mentions the diione or
Dion quintuplets five identical girls
born in Ontario Canada about to turn 2
years old the home of the world famous
quintuplets sorry sir the quintuplets
line is busy yes every day is wash day
for the Dions the first five Dions look
like anybody's children but will always
be known as the brothers and sisters of
those quintuplets that made mother Dion
world famous overnight if you enjoy
these great old episodes of Jack Benny
you can find more at thisday ben.com
so make yourself a plate of apricot
cheese salad and enjoy the
show the jello program starring Jack
Benny with Johnny Green at his orchestra
the orchestra opens a program with
[Music]
wahoo
when next Wednesday comes along look out
for pocketbooks on strings false alarms
at the front door and breaks under hats
because it will be April the 1st each
one of us will have to take our share of
fooling on April Fool's Day but there's
one thing nobody can ever fool you about
that day or any other day and that's
Jello because Jello has that extra Rich
fruit flavor put in by a secret process
and no other gelatin dessert has it all
you have to do is take one taste to know
that here's the best gelatin dessert you
ever tasted crammed with real fruit
flavor extra Rich twice as good Jello
tastes as delicious as the fresh ripe
fruit itself and Jello six glowing
colors have a real Springtime Beauty
just be sure it is jello that you ask
for and don't accept any substitutes
always insist on the one and only
genuine
jello
and now let us welcome back to New York
that wandering boy that prodical son
that Vagabond lover Jack
Benny that's a little more than
usual ah folks what reception GE it's
great to be back in New York again and I
want to tell you from the bottom of my
heart that I well I'm I'm just lost for
words gee I I don't know what to say I I
uh I go on say it Jack well jalo again
why Jack you're trembling all over no
justtin New York see but Don I didn't
expect such a reception on my return
here the Applause the cheers the flowers
what flowers here in my
lapel well uh the audience seems to be
glad that you're back Jack now tell us
about your trip to Pittsburgh Baltimore
and Washington well I'm glad you brought
that up down there's nothing like
traveling around the East the scenery
the crowds the industries it's just
fascinating well uh I hate to argue with
the boss but listen what's the East got
that the West hasn't got oh that's right
Don you're from Denver I guess I started
something but you must admit that you
have no place out west like Niagara Fall
no but we have the Grand Canyon yes but
after all what can you do with a canyon
I mean they're so empty Don is that so
say it would take three Niagara Falls to
fill one Grand Canyon Well it can't be
so good if they want to fill it all
right all right he got me th that one
Jack but go ahead now what else have you
got here in the East what else he's
asking well down right here in New York
we have that great Central Park and Out
West we have jell Stone
Park wait a minute wait a minute that's
that that's pronounced Yellowstone Don
but I can see your point of view and
don't over the beautiful Eastern Rivers
the Delaware the Hudson and the
Mississippi now wait a minute Jack wait
a minute the Mississippi is out west oh
no I won't concede that the Mississippi
is in the East I still claim it's out
west well let's not fight about it the
Mississippi has two parts The Head and
the mouth I'll take the mouth and you
can have the head no I want the mouth
gosh what a silly
argument hello Jack oh hello Mary what's
the matter with you you look like you
didn't win the sweep Stakes oh it isn't
isn't that so much but Don and I just
had an argument he wants the mouth of
the Mississippi that guy would kiss
anybody Mary do you think the scenery
out west is better than in the East sure
Jack I think the Panama Canal is
wonderful the Panama Canal is down south
I know but it's good enough to be in
Hollywood say Kenny come here we're
getting no place tonight and I know
you'll help us get there oh you can
count on me Jack I know but Point black
Kenny which do you like better the east
or the West well deck I'm from
California and you know the climate out
there is so marvelous you can raise
anything that's right you're right there
my father's in a fruit growing business
out there oh I didn't know that Kenny
what does he raise orange
juice that's a fine joke on an empty
stomach who told you to say that I
promise not to tell come on out Kenny
come on who told you to say that well
you must know may
West oh then you do like West better
than the East oh I don't know I never
met Miss
East
Mary Mary Mary what are you laughing at
heraly in the Milky
Way har did you see it no but I heard it
was funny oh right now I'd give $10 to
see Johnny Green here I am and I can
certainly use it can't take a
joke Johnny our hul tonight deals with
the East and the West if you had your
way where would you live where you are
Jack I like your apartment well thank
it's some plays isn't it huh yeah on a
clear day you can see the
window what window but really Johnny
isn't my apartment beautiful did you
notice the baby grand did I how old is
she two come here Johnny I'll tell you
what she said this morning listen I walk
into her nursery and she says hello
Daddy I want to tell you and if you walk
into Jack's Kitchen you will find Jello
in the ice box and all six delicious
flavors strawberry raspberry Cherry
orange lemon and
lime no kidding Jack did she really say
that yeah and what else do you think she
said what pay
[Music]
Johnny
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
a
[Music]
that was so this is heaven played by
Johnny green and his Eastern
Californians say that sounded well
Johnny ah music do sued the Savage Beast
oh thanks Jack I'm glad you liked
[Music]
it course Johnny I come you know I
myself I come from a family of musician
you know my father was quite musical no
really yes in fact my father had a beard
so long that he played a violin 3 years
before he found out it was a
cello but really I am a lover of music
it's always been my ambition to hear
come in as
usual how do you do I'd like to see the
star of this program
yes quiet
rat I'm the star Jack Benny is the name
are you Jack Benny yes sir that's funny
you don't look anything like your
autograph well the profile is a little
different uh what do you want I'm a
violinist here's my card your
card Agnes Bryant n
0610 oh gosh it's on the other side oh
say ja yes Johnny is that Bryant 9 or
Bryant five Bryant n is there anything
else you want yeah have you got a
nickel hey that's the wrong card I'm a
violinist and I'd like to get on this
program what's your name Fritz
Packard you hear that Johnny Fritz
packet are you acquainted with Chrysler
yes we're stopping at the same
garage that's funny I knew you'd say
that H that's a nice that's a nice
violin you have there is it a strat of
varas what's that I said is it a strat
of areas you'll have to pardon me I
can't hear very good well how do you
play the violin by
ear well I'm sorry young man but Mr
Green has several Fiddlers in his orc
and in an emergency I play the violin
myself
why oh just for p time I guess do you
know mendleson spring song what's the
name of it
humores I never heard of it what I'm
looking for is a job well where have you
played before at weddings weddings well
isn't that a good job yes but it only
lasts a minute I can't go on a honeymoon
with
him I guess you're right but listen
young fell I don't think we can use you
this is a comedy program a what a comedy
program well you can trust me it won't
go any
further I don't care how far it goes
it's no secret well don't get S all I
want is a job well you'll have to see
Johnny Green our musical director what
does he do he's over there with a stick
in his hand well I'm not afraid of him
where is
he right over there at the piano oh that
guy well well hello
s hello slerman hey Jack Jack look who's
here well well slerman I didn't know it
was you where didd you learn to speak
English in Hollywood in Hollywood H yes
I made a moving pit for Paramon it's
called fly the special believe me I'm a
second s at
Temple that's great well what did you do
fly back here I came by automobile oh
yeah what kind of a car one day a
limousine the next day a touring car the
next day a road fan oh your thumb does
look a little weather
beaten did you do any Trucking sure from
Detroit to Cleveland hey
hey well anyway slman I'm glad you're
back but tell me what was this violin
trick you were playing on well it's the
only way you can get into this studio
you got to look like a musician well can
you play the violin of course I even
antagonize it here let me show you I'll
give you a sample all right go ahead
come on let's
[Music]
give what the
matter well are you satisfied I'm
satisfied no thing can I
[Music]
learn you're here and I'm here with your
heart and my heart
awake in a
dream in a dream of romance and
Delight can it be that tonight
night you're here and I'm here with your
lip and my lip
awake in a
dream and and the Stars looking down
from
above sing to sing you're in love you're
in
love now I'll walk with wings on my feet
now I'll feel that bitter is
sweet other
eyes may have
charms but my heaven will be in
your you're here and I'm here with your
heart and my heart
awake in a
dream in a dream of romance and Delight
oh my love let it be
tonight
for
tonight is the
night
of
night
that was a wake in a dream sung by Kena
Baker and Now ladies and gentlemen I
would like to read a letter I received
this morning from a woman in
Constantinople South
Dakota regarding the plays we have been
presenting on the jello program she says
Dear Mr Benny I am the mother of 12
children eight of whom are living with
me and the other four listen to your
program
but we would all like to listen tonight
so why don't you give us a play that the
children can enjoy something like
Cinderella or the little glass slipper I
know my kitties would like that sign
yours very truly Mrs Dion
caner see 12 children wa home what do
you think um what do you think of that
Mary can you imagine what people ask you
to do nowadays huh well Jack the
customer's always right I know but
Cinderella say Johnny do you know
anything about Cinderella if I did I
wouldn't
talk Pardon Me Oh Wilson yes Jack here's
a lady who wants us to do Cinderella
what do you think well uh why not do it
it's easy you know it's a fairy tale
yeah I know Cinderella is the
stepdaughter of a very aristocratic
mother who has two daughters of her own
they all go to a ball at the Royal
Palace given by the king but they don't
ask Cinderella as she has no clothes or
social standing the first reason is
enough I think
but how how can we play it Don we
haven't enough women in our cast huh oh
Jack I have an idea why not make it
three brothers you could be the step
brother Cinder Allen Cinder Allen
MH hey there's an idea huh I'm glad
Freddy didn't think of that first you
know and Wilson and Johnny could be the
two mean despicable Brothers smart bit
of casting if you ask me what about
Kenny Baker say Kenny what will you be
I'll be 21 next
week well I didn't have to ask
you know well anyway Madam your children
will get their wish and this place
Cinder Allen will go on immediately
after the next number which will be
played by Johnny Green while Kenny Baker
sits down and writes himself a birthday
card play
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
Johnny
[Music]
la
[Music]
la
[Music]
that was doing the prom played by Johnny
green and his orchestra with Johnny at
the piano and now folks the theater is
already packed for this great play of
ours Cinder Allen and the show is about
to start curtain music
[Music]
John Cinder Allen Cinder Allen what are
you doing there just cleaning the
furnace mother and I'm so tired well
hurry up you little br there's other
work for you to do yes major that step
brother of ours is slower than molasses
and twice as sappy the little
H it's 8:00 now come on you boys
put on your best clothes you know the
king is giving a blowout at the Royal
Palace tonight and you're both invited
okay Ma oh mother can I go to the Palace
too no you're only a
stepchild now you help Donald and
Jonathan with their clothes then get
downstairs with the rest of the ashes
all right mother gee I wish I could go
to the dance now that I've learned how
to swing
it what that
suit you'd be a fine looking sight to
appear before the king yeah you disgrace
us all you're too homely to go any place
I am not homely I'm better looking than
Lanny Ross ain't I
Mary no oh well anyway I'm not in the
play yet oh yes come on boys you must
hurry or you'll be late for the ball all
right goodbye mother goodbye my sons
Cinder Allen get down in the suar and
feed the
rat ah woe is me how I wish I could have
gone to the Palace tonight shut up now
you get to work or I'll beat you to
within an inch of your stop don't you
touch me you may be my stepmother but
don't you come a stepf
father I'm going now you little brat and
when I return I want to find your work
done oh I am so unhappy I wish I was
Victor Hugo so I could be less
miserable ah wo is
me who is
that who are you
prel
ha sounds like the crime Club
program booh hoo hoo what are you crying
for young man oh I wish I
wish cut out that Crosby stuff and tell
me what you wish I wish I could go to
the ball tonight then I shall see that
you go I am your very Godfather that's
news to me but I can't go in these
clothes what will the king and queen
think of this shabby suit Full Of
Cinders with one touch of this and magic
wand you will become a Bo Brama
yes with one touch of this magic wand
and there you
[Music]
are you are now Prince Charming oh
Godfather I look just like Clark
Gable yes and you are dressed better
than Carol Lumbard thank you thank you
for this lovely tuxedo and high silk hat
and have you noticed your slippers yes
father they're a little stiff what are
they made of glass oh glass slippers
isn't that wonderful now my feet can see
where they're
going but tell me Godfather how can I
get to the Palace I have neither coach
nor footman I'll fix that bring me that
table the table
yes here you are
Dracula now I shall touch it with my
magic
wand
[Music]
AO Oh What a Beautiful carriage and look
at the big red letters on the license
plate but Godfather there are no horses
to draw the carriage now leave that to
me go into the kitchen and fetch me six
boxes of you know
what with that extra Rich fresh I get
you here you are Sven garlic now watch h
and you shall have your
horses
strawberry
Rasberry the Cherry orange lemon and
lime oh thank
you thank you Godfather I'm so happy
that I'm going to the Palace after all
and meet the princes yes Cinder Allan
you are going but remember one thing you
must leave the palace and be home me
before the clock strikes 12 or again you
will become a bum remember you must be
home by 12 yes Godfather now could you
touch something else and turn it into 10
bucks so I can take the princess
out I was just going to touch you for 10
bucks I knew we went too far with this
play but wait how can I go I have no
chauffer I'll fix that
[Laughter]
[Music]
too a why Kenny Baker are you my
chauffer yes that's what I get for
hanging around now go Cindy and remember
you must be back by 12 yes yes goodbye
Godfather goodbye Cindy I'll see you
Mindy it wasn't that
funny here you are sir The Rock I don't
want the Roxy I want the palace and get
there before the prices
change yes sir you
bet the next scene finds Cinder Allen
arriving at the Royal Palace where the
ball is in full
[Music]
[Applause]
sway ah princess you dance divinely
shall we stroll into the garden what's
out there the Moonlight I don't want
any H don't forget princess the next
dance is ours all right but it'll cost
you a
dime I wonder who that can be all our
invited guests are here well why not bit
him enter
princess come
[Applause]
in my what a handsome man I wonder who
he can be curses with that guy around we
don't stand a chance with the princess
uh tell me who you are you great big
handsome brute I won't tell it's me
folks you know Cinder
Allen but surely you will tell me I am
the princess oh don't bother with him
he's probably advertising
something go away Jonathan and you too
Donald I'm going to dance with this baby
say what's your name goodlooking Jack
Charming I mean Prince Benny oh I don't
know call me
toots you know brother there's something
familiar about his face he looks not
unlike a Master of Ceremonies that we
know princess who are those Royal p
oh just a couple of my suitors but it's
you I
love ah princess shall we tackle the
minuette okay sailor let's go ah
princess you are wonderful you dance
just like Ginger Rogers and you dance
like Fred a stair well I know enough
steps to be a
stair kiss me kiss me my fair
one oh that guy is here again who's that
I don't know he's been nice to me yes
and it's nearly 12:00 and remember
Prince Charming you must be home by The
Stroke of 12 or Hallelujah you're a bum
ah my beloved I must leave you now I
must be off no no no yes princess I must
fly the clock is striking 12 why are you
afraid of those gongs yes I'm an amateur
Prince what did I tell you you wouldn't
heed my warning look look again I am in
rags and tatters I knew this dream
couldn't last throw the bum out look
look it's our step brother Cinder Allen
I knew his face was familiar but
Godfather what happened to my beautiful
tuxedo I'll show you what happened to it
Horatio Horatio yes Mr
Godfather tell him what happened to his
clothes well princey here's the law down
I rent out sensor suits for all kinds
Den toest grade and Mr grandfather told
me I should rent you this suit until
12:00 Eastern Standard Time well it's
12:00 here I am I got the suit and thank
you a a day a la a day you said it and
you princess don't forget please I want
that dress back in the morning oh look
look I still have my glass slippers that
reminds me I want your socks back in the
morning
too play
johy I'm one of those people who
believes there's a lot of pleasure to be
had from something new and exciting to
eat if you agree and I'll bet you do I
can tell you how to make a grand new
dish it's apricot cheese salad a happy
combination of apricots and lemon jello
here's how to make it dissolve a package
of lemon Jell-O and a pint of warm water
and chill until slightly thicken then
add 2 and 1/2 cups of canned apricots
mold firm and turn out on crisp lettuce
garnished with real mayonnaise and
little squares of cream cheese it's
swell luscious apricots in a clear
shimmering mold of lemon Jell-O you like
the color combination of pale yellow and
apricot gold and you'll go for the
flavor com combination in a big way
Jello tastes twice as good as ever
before so use it for salads as well as
desserts and you'll find it twice as
useful just be sure B red letters on the
package they spell
Jello the last number of the 27th
program in the new Jello series and
we're with you again next Sunday night
at the same time oh Johnny oh yes Jack I
want to wish you good luck on your
opening at the Paramon theater Saturday
thank you very much D and I hope you all
liked our sketch Cinder Allen and the
moral of our little play is be ever so
humble there's no clothes like your own
good night
[Applause]
Co e l
[Applause]
l on our program were awaken a Dream
from the motion fixure desire and Love
In Bloom from she loves me not another
great episode be sure to tell your
friends about this day in Jack Benny
here's a bonus recipe by Don wil
from the Bing Crosby program which he
also announced for and here's good old
Don attention all you good Cooks here's
a recipe that will make any hostess's
reputation a recipe so easy you can
carry it in your head the recipe for
cheese and crab
Delight unwrap a package of creamed Old
English cheese and melt it in the top of
your double
boiler next add 1/3 cup of evaporated
milk seasonings and stir until you have
a smooth golden sauce
into that sauce toss a cup full of flake
crab meat and serve on toast the result
is perfection here's something to serve
at little supper parties and Bridge
lunches but we have still another reason
for giving you this recipe that rich
golden sauce you use in cheese and crab
Delight is also delicious on vegetables
cauliflower onion spinach broccoli fine
on poached eggs too it's marvelous sauce
for dressing up all sorts of common
everyday food but don't expect just any
cheese to make a sauce so smooth and so
delicious The Secret of success is
creamed Old English get a package of
this famous craft cheese tomorrow from
your regular food dealer let the family
have it spread on crackers and in
sandwiches and try it melted in cooked
dishes you'll be Mighty glad you
discovered creamed Old
[Music]
[Applause]
English