I go
good afternoon my name is Jeff grünfeld
chairman of the speakers program welcome
we were searching around for a comedian
and some guy calls up and he says my
name is Jack Benny so I say so what 39
years ago Jack Benny was born in Chicago
Illinois and he's still in years ago I
was 39 still going stronger than ever
he's done a lot of TV specials lately
he's performing with a lot of symphony
orchestras throughout the world very
active in charitable organizations
without much more to say I mean here he
is here is the greatest comedian of all
times mr. Jack Benny
I'm really not the greatest comedian of
all times you know who's the greatest
comedian who ever you personally happen
to think is the greatest comedian they
go to people you have fans come to see
you and they'll say we love you we think
we think you're the best comedian in the
whole world and about 12 minutes later
they'll run into Red Skelton and they'll
say red you're the greatest
so I don't know I think it's whoever
they are fans a lot of people will say
Jack you and Bob Hope or they'll go to
Bob and incidentally Bob and I were in
Jacksonville Florida
not long ago what is it all right for me
to talk now anytime
I don't know I don't know I've been to
school in years I would have but Bob
Hope and I we were in Jacksonville
Florida the Jacksonville University in
which we both received doctorates
doctorates of Fine Arts which meant I
imagined comedy mine I think was
associated with music and Bob as a
comedian and we were supposed to get
these awards or these these tributes at
separate times so a lady who is the Dean
of the Jacksonville University or Dean s
or whatever they call him she called me
and said Jack how would you like thank
you says how would you like instead of
getting it's getting this doctorate
separately you and Bob how would you
like to have it with Bob together maybe
you'll have a lot more fun out of it
so I said I'd love it it all depends on
how Bob feels since we already called
Bob and Bob says he would like it that
way very much now Bob Hope and I
happened to be very very dear close
friends I think next to George Burns Bob
Hope is the closest friend that I have
really in all of show business we have a
great what they call a sort of an
admiration pact both socially and
professionally Bob thinks I'm the best I
think he's the best and if you ask him
and that's the way it that's the way it
goes and so we had a lot of fun but the
only thing is he made me he made me
laugh too soon and you kids might be too
young to appreciate what I'm going to
tell you what he said to me when we
first put on the cap and gown and we
walked on the stage
and we were supposed to be serious for a
minute and Bob turned to me and said he
looked at us here we are in calf and
Gandhi says you want to know something
jack we make Kay Kyser look like nothing
now a lot of you don't remember Kay
Kyser
in cap and gown or do you because he had
the musical knowledge I don't know
something he had an orchestra and he was
always dressed in cape and god cap and
gown you see so I was laughing right
away when I wasn't supposed to was a
little too soon to laughs before we
received our tribute you see but do you
know the the nicest part of a lecture or
this kind of a thing is when people ask
questions and you can answer them it's
like a press I always do this at a press
party I sit him in a group like you have
here only we only have maybe 12 13
people and they will all ask questions
and I answer them and then they can each
pick out what they want and use it in
the paper you see now I must tell you
something you know there's a school
named after me in my hometown Waukegan
Illinois it's called the Jack Benny
junior high school and it was built it
was built nine years ago now this was
when people say to me what is the
proudest moment of your entire career I
think I would have to say when my
hometown Waukegan Illinois built a
school and they built it to be named
after me they didn't take a poolroom and
make a school out of it you know and
then say we'll call it the Jack Benny
school room they actually built the most
beautiful high school and I was there
for the groundbreaking and then they
opened this school about nine years ago
it's a beautiful modern schools called
the Jack Benny
junior high school now I go there
occasionally and I speak to the classes
and I've got to tell you one of the
funniest things that happened you see it
being a junior high school they have
wait am I tell you the names of the
other high schools the Thomas Jefferson
and the Daniel Webster imagine Daniel
Webster Thomas Jefferson and Jack Benny
I think they're gonna have an Abraham
Lincoln one they're too nice to do a
joke about that but it's just a joke of
course but it might be funny as long as
I mentioned they're gonna build it the
Abraham Lincoln school and I told them
there when I spoke that I was so happy
about that because the only thing that I
was interested in when I went to school
was American history I hated everything
else in fact I flopped and everything
else and was thrown out of high school
my first year for not studying and yet
there's a school named after me
so you can imagine how ridiculous that
is but I used to do a joke about I was
so glad that Abraham Lincoln cuz he was
my favorite president and the reason I
said he was my favorite president
because I said any man that'll walk 12
miles barefoot in the snow and return a
library book to save three cents as my
kind of a guy
I wanted to get a laugh long enough so I
could drink some water well anyway now I
had to go there
I usually go there diploma time you see
and I give out some of the diplomas now
I go to the different classes and I talk
and let me tell you what happened the
last time I was there one of the classes
there were the youngest smallest kids in
that you've ever seen and I swear that
over half of the kids didn't even know
who I was actually actually did not know
who Jack Benny was because they were
small you know and by this time I had
stopped doing my weekly radio and
television shows and I was doing
specials like two a year which went on
at 11 o'clock or 10 o'clock at night and
they didn't they couldn't stay up to
hear it so we got to a point where we
come we came to the place where they're
supposed to be questions and answers now
don't forget this is called the Jack
Benny junior high school and here are
little kids and arrow don't even know
the hell I am you know
well anyway finally they asked questions
those who did know all about me and
asked me questions and I answered him
you know the best way that I could and
finally a little girl raised her hand I
take an oath ladies and gentle
I take an oath she raised her hand I
said yes honey what is it she says mr.
Benny I said yes why did they name you
after our school
well you never heard such a scream from
people who did know who I was then I had
to go through a whole explanatory thing
to this little kid in the class that I
was some kind of a star you know that I
was somebody in show business and that
walk Tegan felt that I have done a lot
for Waukegan I really didn't couldn't
walk Keegan isn't much bigger now than
it was when I lived there when I was a
kid so I don't think I did too much for
walk again but for those and it was such
a you see little kids they asked the
right things you know they know exactly
what to say they know exactly you know
they're so different like kids let me
explain something to you you know I play
Las Vegas quite often
maybe two three times a year and
everybody asks for autographs now
there's an old expression of course
there's no fool like an old fool
now sometimes some old person a man or a
woman will ask me for an autograph and
they'll be very silly about it or try to
be funny but you never find it with
little kids see little kids they have no
inhibitions and they don't know what it
means to be funny if they want an
autograph they'll come right up in a
very nice way and ask me now I was
playing in Las Vegas it was last in the
summer so this is when the parents take
their kids to Las Vegas they might not
be able to go in and hear a Buddy
Hackett
but they can come in to hear me so
finally a little girl walked up to me I
want to show you how smart some of these
kids can be and she says mr. Benny my
mother and I my father we saw your show
last night and I enjoyed it very much
and I said thank you and she had the
cutest face you've ever seen in your
life a little she couldn't have been I
doubt if she wouldn't was 9 years old so
finally she said to me mr. Benny may I
have your autograph
I said you certainly may but let me tell
you something young lady I charge for
autographs
now I was gonna have a little bit of fun
with her and let me tell you what how
she what she how she made a fool out of
me I said I charge so she laughed she
knew I was kidding and she what do you
charge hate well a face like yours
I'll give you an autograph but you must
give me a kiss I charge a kiss for
little girls for an autograph Jesus all
right
so she gave me her autograph book and I
signed it and I said now wait a minute
before I give it to you the autograph he
must give me a kiss so she gave me a
kiss
now she walked away and I swear she
wasn't eight steps away when she ran
back he says mr. Benny
I said yes she says what do you charge
little boys isn't that something
now for a little kid to think of that
the think of sex and that way I had a
couple of things that I didn't want to
forget that I wanted to talk about about
because as a rule you know people want
to know when they ask me to deliver a
lecture to talk they'd like to know
something about show business or they'd
like to know something about comedy or
humor which is humor of course and what
is funny and what isn't funny
now what is funny is the most difficult
question to answer that any comedian has
ever been asked it's so much more
difficult to answer there's a great
difference between drama and comedy and
yet they are akin but there is a
difference in this way it's almost easy
to answer a questions about dramatics or
dramatic actors or drama because they
have rules certain set rules about
acting that you must learn and you must
study and you must know we're comedians
every comedian can be entirely different
and they don't work exactly alike I
don't know of two comedians who actually
work exactly alike
or whose style of humor isn't entirely
different than someone else's so it gets
to the point like let me put it this way
if you took a poll
of 20 or 30 or 40 people and ask each
one of them what they thought comedy was
what they thought was funny
you could get 40 different answers and
each one would be correct each answer
would be right because each one as maybe
a different sense of humor like for
instance if somebody likes me very much
he probably would not be the same type
of an audience that were like Red
Skelton and yet it could be good like
both of us you know but it depends and
trying to explain humor because that's
imagine one of the reasons I'm here is
about as difficult as anything that I
can think of because I know I never
studied it to me everything was an
accident do you know what I was when I
was first in shobun that was a fiddler
that's what I was I was a fiddler and
then during the First World War I joined
the Navy and we had a sailor show I'm
sure you wonder how I became a comedian
I'm gonna tell you whether you want an
order or not you're going to hear it how
I became a comedian
we had a sailor show when I was in the
Navy because this was the what they call
the Navy Relief Society and they had a
so a sailor show called the Great Lakes
review and I was merely supposed to play
the fiddle and be in the chorus now
there was a part that the author wrote
for an Admiral's orderly who was
supposed to be a comedian so he had to
pick somebody out and I swear by
accident at random he pointed to me and
he says hey young fella come over here
don't forget I was a young fella there's
the First World War
you know
he says come here a minute I've got
three four lines I want you to read and
they were comedy lines well I didn't
know whether I could read comedy lines
or anything about it but I read them and
he thanked me and the next day we went
back to rehearsal and he called me over
and he had six or seven more lines for
me and at each rehearsal my part got
bigger and bigger and bigger and when
the show opened at the auditorium in
Chicago I had the comedy part of the
show and that's how I became a comedian
now maybe I would have become a comedian
anyway
but I have to give this author credit
his name was David Wolfe give give him
credit for calling me over could have
been somebody else and this is how I bet
became a comedian but don't forget I
also had a lot of nerve because I had on
a uniform a sailor uniform which perhaps
gave me a little more guts you know to
be able to do this I didn't have guts as
a fighter as a comedian yes they so
that's how I became a comedian and as
soon as the war was over and I went back
into show business
I still took the fiddle with me because
I was frightened you know and I'd have
the fiddle in one hand and the bow in
the other and I would do a lot of yags
and talk and the fact that I had the
violin and the bowl with me made all my
talk sound impromptu it made it sound as
though I were ad-libbing because they're
not they always felt that I was ready to
play the violin and I was making up
things as I went along and believe me I
wasn't I knew every word I was going to
say and I found out that I could also
write pretty good for myself now you
asked I've had people ask me now there
are different kinds of comedians there
are the one line
now take Bob Hope who is a great
comedian but Bob Hope does like
one-liners he'll tell a joke another
joke another joke a lot of them do that
but I seem to find out I must have known
this innately that innately is the right
word isn't it my god I don't want to
make a mistake here that I must have
found out actually by myself that it
isn't good for me as a comedian to just
do one joke after another joke about a
glass of water and the next minute a
joke about a microphone or something
this is not right for me I must talk on
subjects and if I change a subject and
this is a way I always do it and you'll
usually find it that way whether I play
Las Vegas or whether I'm on television
or whatever I do you'll usually find
that I'll stay on a subject as long as I
can and when I change the subject I try
to change it so gracefully that you as
an audience don't even realize I change
the subject now that's my type of humor
somebody else is entirely different
some are one-liners who just talk now
Bob Newhart who I think is a great great
comedian he also has a way of talking
and talking and talking on a subject
then he has pieces of business that he
does in between you know I'm a great
admirer of his but if a person were to
say to me how did you become a comedian
that's the only way I can explain it now
maybe even if that author hadn't asked
me I might have become a comedian
because I started as a fiddler even
before the first world war not long ago
that was I was a better fit ler then
than I am now and now I give concerts
which shows you how ridiculous that is
but I would like to say now that there
should be a question and answer period
because otherwise if I just talk I'll
probably forget a lot of things I would
like to say to you where I won't if you
ask questions that you'd like to know
maybe I can answer them maybe I can't
but I'll certainly try I usually get the
best results that way and so do you as
an audit and anybody wants to ask a
question there are two mics there are
two standing mics one on either end so
that we can pick it up so the rest of
the audience can hear the question
also while waiting for people to get to
the microphones I'd like to ask you a
question about a story I heard and
perhaps you could tell me if it's true
or not he's the first one I understand
ones like you were at an airport and it
was like a pay telephone and like after
leaving you had forgotten your wallet in
there and not having any money you had
to climb underneath the door and one of
your friends caught you which sort of I
guess reinforced your image of being
cheap would you like to hear that story
yeah it didn't happen in an airport it
happened on my actually my way going to
the airport was in San Francisco and I
want to show you what an embarrassing
position you can get into when you were
built up a character of being stingy
now I don't mind having a
characterization of being very stingy
because it's a funny one it's the one
where you can get the biggest laughs by
being stingy because every family has
somebody another stingy
so now the reason I also don't mind
being stingy is because actually I'm not
I think meri and I my wife and I spend
more money than any two people in show
business that's why I'm working so much
if you wanna know the realtor we both
spent a bloody fortune so therefore I
don't mind it it's like I don't let me
try to pretty it's like I don't believe
that Carroll O'Connor is actually a what
does that word a a bigot I don't believe
he's a bigot because if he were actually
a bigot I don't think he would play he
could play that character is he as a
matter of fact I had when I used to do
my specials I had four writers and one
of my writers was so stingy in real life
really so tight that I used to ask him
how can you write funny things for me
when you are that stingy yourself and he
merely laughed you know it didn't bother
a midden but the thing the story that
you want to tell this is a true story
you know I'll tell you what it was I was
in San Francisco and I was living at the
Fairmont Hotel I was there to do a
benefit and the next morning we had to
leave for the airport someone picked us
up I was there with my manager so we go
downstairs and when I went downstairs I
if you'll pardon me I had to go to the
bathroom so I thought well I'm not going
all the way upstairs again I'm going the
one in the lobby the men's room so I go
inside and I look in my pocket and I had
a quarter and a dime so I put the dime
in and I went to the bathroom
now we leave and we get into the airport
we get we're driving towards the airport
and I look at my back in my back pocket
and I cannot find my wallet which was a
checkbook and a wallet and I didn't mind
I didn't have that much money in it but
they you know you always have cards and
everything you don't want to lose it
so I said oh my goodness I left my
wallet in my room
have we got time to go back the driver
says we've got plenty of time so he
drives me back
this is word-for-word the way it
happened he drives me back to the hotel
I'm glad you mentioned that by the way
and I go up to the bedroom and I'm
looking all over for this checkbook and
wallet and I can't find it I thought
well I don't know so I had to leave I go
to as I went downstairs I thought wait a
minute maybe it dropped out of my
trousers into the men's room so I go
over there I got just about enough time
right and I looked under and there is my
chair now I look in my pocket and I've
only got a quarter
and there's nobody around there to get
changed and I didn't want to run back I
had to leave I had to get to the airport
so I thought well I'm only gonna sneak
under there and get thee and get the
wallet so I started to crawl under there
and wouldn't you know a man walked in
and when I stuck my head out he
recognized me oh yeah but wait a minute
now I haven't finished it yet so finally
I'm so embarrassed I don't know what
they're doing he had a car sort of a
silly smile on his face
cause he now he really thought I'd I was
trying to sneak in there so I took an
oath I said look at mister I know you
know I'm Jack Manning I want you to do
me a favor
I've been in here once I paid the dime I
said now look under there and that's
where I lost my wallet now have you got
change for a quarter I'll be able to go
in and get it he said no but I'll tell
you what I'll do
I'll give you the dime because by god
this story is worth it and he gave me a
dime I put it in got my wallet and went
to the airport
oh that really oh I told it on one of
the talk show Johnny Carson show or
something
I don't remember now let's have a
question from over there
anybody mr. Benny do you think wonder
what your opinion is on the thought that
can you hold that do what he said he
hasn't fed I don't hear no can you hear
me now yeah yeah do you think is
possible that making stinginess the
object of derision encourages free
spending and tends to help inflation
does the makings dizziness the object of
division tend to increase free spending
and then resolve an inflation
in this conflation well I'll tell you
what it's done to me this character that
I play costs me a fortune that I have to
spend an awful lot of money to
compensate for being so cheap
so whether that has anything to do with
it I'm helping inflation or hurting it I
don't know but I know that when wherever
I go when I go for to a restaurant with
people and I treat people I have to
leave a great big tip a bigger tip than
anyone any wealthy man would have to
give just because of the stingy
character you see and I'll tell you I'll
tell you something very funny if you'd
like to hear about that about once you
know I'm a very big tipper to to taxi
drivers and I'll tell you why I always
have a feeling that if I take a cab and
I only go a short distance maybe I'm
taking somewhere someone away from a
good corner you know so this happened in
Las Vegas I had a goal from the Sahara
Hotel to the Riviera and I think it was
like I don't know a dollar ten cents
something like that
and when I got out of the cab I gave the
driver $3 and I told him to keep the
change
now where did you hear what he said to
me and forgive me for using the word
because it's the only way I can explain
and see only way it's funny he said to
me mr. Benny I'm sorry you did that
I'm sorry you gave me such a good tip
don't forget it was a dollar 90 cent tip
for a dollar 10 cent I'm sorry you did
that he said why he said because I
wanted to be able to go home and tell my
wife what a cheap son of a you are
and I couldn't do it so I said to him
yes you can
just give me back the tip he said
although no he says that I won't do but
I do I tip I'm a big tipper I spend a
lot of money particularly on tips
because of this character of my cheap
Singhji character now whether that has
anything to do with it will have
anything to do with inflation I don't
know my one person won't won't be able
to do it or help it or hurt it than
anyway it's a question from there I have
a question about Thomas Brandon's play
Charley's aunt I'm a very long fan of
that Charley's and and I was wondering
how you got the part and also why did
they change the idea of Charlie as being
a 38 year old college student is so the
way it was written in the play you gotta
help me with these I don't hear that
good sorry I didn't hear it easy
something about no it's something about
Charlie's aunt that you want to know
about the movie I made I'll repeat the
question then all right my question is
yes that Charlie's aunt was supposed to
be a college student and played a 38
year old college student yes why did
they change the idea of what was going
on you look young enough to play a
college student I thought he did well I
think I know what you're getting at let
me tell you how embarrassed I was about
making that picture it was a very funny
picture and everybody who made Charlie's
aunt was very successful with it and I
think I hate to say this but I think I
made one of the best Charlie and
pictures and Baxter was in it she was
just a little kid the only embarrassing
part of it for me was as you mentioned
the school is when we went to the
premiere of the picture at the Chinese
Theatre the first 20 minutes of it I had
to be a college boy well for God's sakes
even then I could have been a college
boys grandfather and I want to tell you
when that first 20 minutes went on and
even though I made this a long time ago
I was still too old to be a college boy
and I sat in my seat like this so
embarrassed and was filled with
entertainers and the oil knew me and it
was embarrassing until I got into my
Charlie Sam costume and then it was
funny but the first few minutes of that
was murder
it really was if I don't know what I'm
answering your question because you you
did want to know something about my
going to college at that age isn't that
right well that's it I was very
embarrassed about it
the one Oh the real truth once I got
into the costume it was alright but they
had Nova but do you know what let me
tell you what happened not long ago do
you know that many times studios do not
think of comedians and some of us in
terms of age are you know Bob Hope is
about nine years ten years younger than
I am but we they offer us parts do you
know that not long ago I would say about
12 years ago I was offered a part a
script sent me where they wanted me to
play the part of a baseball pitcher in
his prime which was so ridiculous you
know this was really ridiculous a
baseball pitcher whose prime who was by
the time he's 40 is practically through
you know but that's because they see is
so often that I don't think even people
in the audience's think of us in terms
of age as long as you don't get ill you
know if you stay healthy and if you look
good I try to look as good as I can I
try to stay as thin as I can because if
I'm gonna stay in show business and so
does Bob if I'm going to stay in show
business I want to look as good as I can
or get the hell out of the business one
or the other so I try to look as young
as I can now I know that I'm I know I
look younger than I am
but I I think so
okay go ahead a word from our sponsor
I've heard that uni camp is collecting
here this week and from what I've been
told it's a very worthwhile cause there
is a barrel in the back of the of the
room and it would be nice of each of you
on the way out could maybe drop a small
contribution your quarters your pennies
your nickels or dimes or whatever wait
am i explaining that a little more to me
what's that for uni camp is a camp for
the underprivileged the diabetic
I believe physically I have diabetes by
the way but it's so light that I eat
anything I believe some physically
disabled children handicapped
underprivileged children it's it's the
campus charity it's the gum probably one
of the one of the few good things the
campus does worthwhile for the community
what's your first name Jeff yeah that's
right if I give money they've got to get
their stuff I certainly hope so
I certainly all right now wait a minute
I'll tell you what I've I'll put in $20
now they got a place on $20 for mr.
Benny
and I want to show you something I got
smaller chains there's a $10 bill in a
dollar I want her to show off that was
the whole thing I don't know we're
starting it all for $20 I'd like to
thank mr. Benny on behalf of uni camp
have another question here from the mic
yes my question is how are the
alligators oh well that is a question
that a lot of people wouldn't understand
but I'm glad he remembers it now that's
marvelous he must be a very young fella
you know the vault that I used to have
in radio those who remember a radio and
then a little bit in television but
television was tougher to get the vault
seen in but to protect my fault
I had a moat with alligators in it I
don't think they're there anymore I
don't
but that's nice that you remember that
far back I think that's nice mr. Benny
yeah I'd like to know how you first met
Fred Allen well
now that's a nice question and it's a
question that I'd like to answer because
they usually ask it in a different way
they usually say that how did the feud
start with Fred Allen now naturally I've
known Fred Allen for years and years
before the feud because we were both
comedians in vaudeville say and one day
all these things that that happen to me
that were good happened by accident one
day Fred Allen had a little ten-year-old
boy play the B on the violin and Fred
knew I always excuse me Fred knew I
always listened to his program and he
said to the boy how old are you after he
played the B and he said he was ten
years old now he's um
50 or 40 so he then he then Fred made
derogatory remarks about me as a
violinist knowing I was listening so the
next week I answered him then the
following week he answered me and this
went on I want to tell you something
ladies and gentlemen this went on for
about eight months this feud before we
even got together on the telephone to
discuss what we're going to do next and
that's why that's why it was successful
because of Fred Allen and I or anybody
any couple said let's have a feud
it would have turned out lousy because
it would have been I don't know it
wouldn't have been unnatural fueled this
way we just kept you know making
derogatory remarks patting each other
without even talking to each other he
was in New York and I was in Los Angeles
and we kept this feud on until it got to
a point where we felt we ought to appear
together and that's how we got on that's
how we got on the phone Fred Allen he
was a great wit you know what he said
about me once he said that made the
funniest remark you've ever heard before
they built the school for me in Waukegan
years ago they wanted to pay me some
kind of a tribute and they planted a
tree in Waukegan a little tree in the
course Courthouse Square and the tree
died
and on Fred Allen's next program
he said nearly had that Meisel voice he
said how can a tree live and Waukegan
with the SAP in Hollywood hey
everybody's leaving what is it all right
we have time for one more quick I got
all the time in the world yes you're not
going to get any more money from me I
hope I'm not beating a dead horse just
one more plug for unicamp
Mardi Gras is coming up and all proceeds
of that will go to UNICAMP as well so I
hope you can do your best to UM attend
that and have all your friends come down
mr. Benny you said yeah you became a
comedian just by accident and
accommodation of lucky breaks how does
one who's very determine again to comedy
today how does one become a comedian I
didn't came out as one who was very
determined to get the comedy how does he
get into the field
that is the tough question answered the
only way I know how I wouldn't know how
now I mentioned Bob Newhart before he
used to be an accountant and he used to
make speeches at their committee
meetings or whatever it was and he found
out he was funny and he got laughs and
that's how he got into show business but
how you would study to be a comedian I
don't know I think some way some you
have to find out by yourself that your
delivery is right that even in
conversation maybe with people that is
right I'll swear I bet there must be
some one person in this room whether
it's a girl or a boy that could become a
fine comedian but if you said to me how
do you become the comedian I swear I
don't know how I don't know now if you
have a beautiful voice that you know
what you can do you can sing and then
you can talk between songs and maybe
become a fine comedian you see the girl
jolson eddie cantor but how you just go
out to become a comedian I wish I knew
how to answer that question
and nobody's I've ever been able to
answer that question I don't think there
might be schools maybe there are classes
for it in schools where someone knows
how to outer try try them out
how to give them a routine or talk to do
and see what it sounds like and hear
what it sounds like maybe that way other
classes for that they're not did you
hear it mr. Benny not right over here
this is God no the probably very many
classes to become a comedian it's more
of a natural ability but my real
question is how
get the people that have the authority
to say hey you are funny I'm gonna put
you in front of a camera I'm put you on
stage and we can make money with you and
you can really become a celebrity how do
you get that person to listen to you you
do hear all that
to get people who haven't get the
you know the people who are interesting
well this is a very tough thing to is to
meet the people once you have the
ability you have to be discovered now
hard now your next question naturally
would be well how do you how do you
become discovered how do you get
discovered it if you know somebody who
knows a producer or an agent or
representative who can book you
someplace because it's very difficult to
be discovered just trying something out
in a room or an office you actually have
to work someplace and if somebody if you
knew somebody well enough that could get
you that kind of a job who he himself
has faith in you so that he can say to a
representative I have a friend that I
think is a good comedian I wish you'd go
over and see them that's the only
possible way that I that I could know
how to do it because oh boy I can't tell
you the people that I've tried to help
and it's been murdered you know if I try
to help a girl even a lot of them think
oh there must be something going on
there between he and the girl or he
wouldn't be trying to have well they
don't believe you know
all right if everybody's breaking for
class are the only closing remark I can
say is that I'm very flattered that I
was invited to be here and I enjoyed
talking because I like to hear myself
talk anyway and I love the audience's
and I think their questions were right I
wish I could have heard him a little bit
better and if at some future time when
you when there will be other people they
will have forgotten what I said invite
me again and I'll be glad to come back
here again
been a great friend anything