Hollywood
the Jack Benny program
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with Jack special guest Lauren's wealth
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now ladies and gentlemen it gives me
great pleasure to present to you mr.
lawrence welk and his champagne music
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by travelpod member
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and must tell you that your music is
just wonderful what I said your music is
wonderful
Jack I'm afraid I don't know of course
of course I'm sorry I never say your
music is wonderful
you you know everybody mispronounced the
stud ward yeah but I was tell you Lord
that really it's wonderful having you
wonderful having you and your fine
musicians on my show thank you very much
jack and you know you've had t have
unless you for a long time you've had
quite a career I mean what to what you
would tribute you're wrong such a wrong
success you know standing well Jack
there are no doubt many reasons but I
think the main reason is because we
never went in for that while that the
far out music far out music yes like a
column Bardo and Wayne King
or Sammy K yeah he was crazy man
yeah but you know really you have had
you know and I've always loved your
theme song such a beautiful theme song
but where did you ever get the idea for
those bubbles well Jax to be honest that
came about by accident it was during the
days of my one-night stands back in the
Midwest we've been out on the road for
about six weeks
and one night just as we started to play
I looked up and there were all the
bubbles coming from behind the brass
section and jagged was beautiful really
beautiful it was well what the I mean
where did you get the idea well really
uh from no one the trombone player was
doing his laundry
doing is longer yes well thanks to a
power T Sox I got a million dollar Frank
well that's wonderful but listen
everybody
but you mean you mean everybody in the
band does they do their laundry on the
stage for the next 5 years we were known
as the cleanest music this side of Pismo
Beach
but you know Lawrence of course in those
days every orchestra they had a sort of
a slogan you know and like for instance
I remember even Phil Harris when he was
with me in radio he was known as Phil
Harris and his international Orchestra
international meaning that he was as
well known in San Diego as he was in
Tijuana
but warrants I am NOT call you Larry
told me anything you wanted to do it
well Lawrence you know the I want to
tell you something won't be offended and
what I'm going to sing are no go right
ahead well you know this thing of
conducting an orchestra leading an
orchestra that's a that's a sort of a
racket isn't it what do you mean a
racket well I mean there's nothing to
leading an orchestra it isn't that just
a rack and I'm here you stand there with
a stick like you know you're going up
and down I mean if you had a hammer in
your hand at least you could be building
something
or cracking nuts but just to stand there
with a stick
up and down I think handy but I think
anybody in the world can conduct an
auction I don't mean just you I'm not
trying to insult you believe me
I think anybody can conduct an all you
mean anybody can lead anarchist I think
I can lead an orchestra I'll show you
what I mean yeah I have your baton
sure yes second now would you just stay
over there I never directed an auction
before in my life I want to show you
there's nothing
Oh fellas fellas you're writing I just
want you to just one second all right
boys oh wow ah
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all right fellas all right they played a
joke on me they ran off all right Punk
you can come back you played your little
joke come on back come on back you're on
the stand
Oh big funny man
now look at Bronx now I'm gonna show you
what I mean about conducting the
orchestra they were kidding me before
you know running ball I'll show you that
that it's easy to do and we're going to
play ladies and gentlemen we're going to
repeat that number roll roll roll ready
a 1 a 2
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they were just tuning up
hi boys I want a two
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hi boys a 1 a 2
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you
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look at I can't understand I look at
they they followed you all the way so
why wouldn't they the millet why
wouldn't they follow me I'll tag you see
they have a certain loyalty to me after
all we've been together for 30 years
well I know well what about what's the
drummer's name the one that was loyal to
me Benedict Arnold
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now look at Larry
you know you sound like your ad libbing
I wonder I must admit that when I asked
you and the boys to come here to do a
show with me that I had an ulterior
motive
do did yes you know years ago in radio
when I was ready to I wrote a song a
very beautiful song and for some reason
or other was a ballad
nothing ever became a but I took it some
of our greatest publishers they couldn't
do anything with I took him to Dimitri
qiyamah Caen to get one hit for his
arrangements nothing happened I even
took it to George Burns and he refused
to sing it didn't help
now listen but I am sure look I'm sure
that with your orchestra playing it
it'll do something for this number okay
I'll be glad to do anything I can but
I'm kind of surprised you really wrote a
song I wrote a beaut it's a ballad a
torch song Jay and I wrote the words and
the music what's the title or waiting to
hear the title is beautiful when you say
I beg your pardon
then I'll come back to you
now Lawrence I'll bet you've never heard
a title like that before heaven no I
haven't Jagan I've been in the music
business for 37 years
well look at I happen to have a copy of
it right here you see and I just want to
sing these lyrics to you and then I'm
sure the miniature here you'll you'll
what you want to do this with York's
there it'll be a big help
listen to the lyrics they're every bit
as good as the title all right now
listen to this when you say I beg your
pardon
then I'll come back to you will you ask
me to forgive you I'll return like the
swallows that Sorrento returned to
Capistrano
for you wait a minute jag wait a minute
Serrano yes that's a little a little
town and in Italy and the birds flew all
the way from Savannah to Capistrano
that's right well that's over 10,000
miles the squalor couldn't possibly fly
that far look at what do you belong to
the Musicians Union or the Audubon
Society
now listen to this will you listen the
rest of this when you stop laughing it
when you say that you are sorry
then I will understand near the Harvest
Moon will pledge our love anew on love
anew so my darling though we pardon come
back to whence we started
yes when that's a poetic form of the
word we're but look if you can say
wonderful I can say when
listen to finish if you can say what no
so my god so my darling though we parted
come back to whence we started and
sweetheart then I'll come back to you
now large you'll have to admit that's a
beautiful song Jack if that's a
beautiful song I've been hit on my head
with one bubble too many you can't tell
by my singing I think your organ should
play really yeah
but Jack fortunately my men don't have
the music to this song oh well I'll tell
you what I did I put the music on their
stands and they know nothing about it
I'm gonna give a to him now and we're
gonna play then you'll see how good it
is open the curtains up now fellas look
turn the page you got my music up there
when you say I beg your pardon then I'll
come back to you that's the number right
there I can't find the part oh it's a
number 13 melody
mr. Fehmi on the concert missed I don't
care this is my song look like he
swallowed Mickey Mouse to let the tail
gimme a would you please a
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when you say I beg your pardon
then I'll come back to you when you ask
me to forgive you I'll return
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like the swallows and Serrano
Randall lied Alaska
when you say that you are sorry then I'm
understand little Harvest Moon will
pledge our love
so my darling though we parted come back
to whence we started
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couple a form of the word where sit down
we'll finish this
wait a minute jack
take the whole arrangement isn't very
good and the song must be improved come
over here let me talk to you about
something Oh for heaven sake it was
going so beautifully I haven't Marty mr.
Arnold
Wow you know I have an idea I believe we
might be able to salvage this song if we
would put it into a polka star which is
more our style of music you mean my
beautiful torch song into a poke uh-huh
you think it would work yeah let me show
you what I mean there might be maybe I
don't know let's try it okay you take
mr. baby
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first
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ladies and gentlemen I hope you all
enjoyed the show now once again I'd like
to present my guest star Lawrence Welk I
hope you'll be on my show again Jack
when you say I beg your pardon
then I'll come back to you
tonight folks I'll be seeing you soon
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mmm
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and
Oh
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you