one cherry phosphate one cherry
phosphate
hey buddy I've got a broadcast to do in
a few minutes will you please hurry with
my sandwich want to eat after the
broadcast
because I'm hungry now get the sandwich
okay mr. Benny what kind was that again
a tuna fish and peanut butter on rye
bread oh yes with an egg in it the egg
goes on my malted milk now hurry please
oh hello Don oh hello jack think I'll
have time for a bite to eat before our
broadcast yes if we can get a little
service here sit down okay
well there goes my new straw hat that
did it oh that's too bad
Jack I didn't see it is it crushed like
a pansy in a dictionary
as I had Christ well I'm so sorry jack I
think I'll to pay for it how much did it
cost no no forget about it doc okay just
think few more minutes and we'll be
doing an Appy yes just mail me a check
hi mr. Wilson what'll it be I'll have a
club sandwich please
okay one club' for tubby and hurry mine
while you're at it
hi Jacqueline oh hello Mary hello what
are you eating Jack oh my regular tuna
fish and peanut butter what a man just
because they named a sandwich after you
eat it every time you come in here well
why shouldn't I the Jack Benny
three-decker delight is very helpful I
always eat things that are full of
vitamins then why don't they show Oh
quiet
here's your club sandwich mr. Wilson
thank you what's yours miss Livingston I
have a pineapple Nut sundae with
cherries and lots of whipped cream
thank goodness Mary why don't you eat
something with vitamins okay put some
tuna fish on it
marry you better save all those cute
remarks for the program
and incidentally young lady as long as
this is our farewell appearance I wish
you'd be a little more careful what you
say you mean I shouldn't tell him what
happened at Paramount yesterday ha ha ha
don't you dare what happened very
nevermind see you're starting already
go on Mary what was it yeah what
happened you stay out of that and get my
sandwich well done
it seems that paramon gave Fred Allen
Dorothy Lamour is old dressing room
which is right next to Jack only Jack
didn't know that fed was in there
non-exact it not exactly know anyway
Jack knocked on the door and yelled
hello Dorothy
hello sweetheart what happened Mary Fred
yell back don't come in I haven't got my
sarong on
yeah but he didn't fool me for a minute
but Jack I thought you told mark
sandwich the director that you wouldn't
make a picture with Alan
well we compromised on Alan can be in
the picture but he has to be the
straight man he gives me all the leads
and I give all the answers well that'll
be a novelty the questions getting the
last I'll get the last don't worry
here's your pineapple sundae miss
Livingston five hey wait a minute she
just got here
where's my three-decker bills putting a
poop deck on it
don't get fancy just bring it in hiya
kids you better step on it we'll be on
the air in a few minutes
well look who's on time tonight what's
the matter Phil does your conscience
bother you because this is our farewell
program Holy Smoke is this our last
broadcast I better start saving my doll
yes maestro you have about 30 minutes
left to get an annuity so make it snappy
want a feat which hiya bub just give me
a glass of water glass of water okay put
some bromo in it I thought so a bromo
seltzer a one Phil Harris special they
know you like a book hey Phil hey hey
hey you check Benny from the radio
that's me
my program goes on just a few minutes
yeah later last week oh you did but I
didn't like it
it's too bad you know I can't please
everybody
yeah me so long I'll be
goodbye I'm gonna worry whether whether
he likes me or not here's your sandwich
mr. Benny well it's about time
give me that Maulik milk too okay boy am
i hungry
say Jack I better run along upstairs
I'll see you in the studio all right
down well I'll be darned hey buddy I
ordered a tuna fish and peanut butter
well what's the matter this is tuna fish
and peanut brittle
a fine combination well we're all out of
peanut butter
the nice time to tell me bring me
something else then bring me a turkey
sandwich okay one turkey for jerky now
see here young man I'm a very good
customer and if you think that I'm a
mister is this seat taken
no sit right down hey Jack it's getting
late we better get out of here yeah come
on Jack some we'll be late for the
broadcast oh I think I got time to eat a
sandwich pardon me mister what time is
it the time yes I don't know hey Eddie
what time is it I don't know hey Bill
what time is it
I don't know hey come on Mary hurry up
bill
[Applause]
oh the jello program starring jack belly
with Mary Livingston Phil Harris Dennis
day and yours truly Don Wilson the
orchestra opens the program was down by
the Ohio
[Music]
in all ladies and gentlemen a great many
desserts are outstanding for one single
quality some you remember for their
delightful taste others for the tempting
appearance their simplicity or their low
cost but when it comes to jello there's
a dessert that has everything color yes
color so gay and inviting the jello is a
joy just to look at flavor extra rich
flavor as downright refreshing as the
fresh juicy ripe fruit itself ease and
speed for jello dissolves instantly and
sets quickly economy because one package
costing only a few pennies serves the
average family and generous style and
last but not least variety or with jello
you can enjoy any number of novel and
satisfying desserts so be sure to keep a
goodly supply of jello on the pantry
shelf at all times then you'll always be
ready to serve family and friends their
favorite treat jello the dessert that
really has everything
[Music]
[Applause]
down by the Ohio played by the orchestra
and now ladies and gentlemen it is only
fitting that on this our last program of
the season
I should pay tribute to the man who has
guided us through the past 36 weeks oh
don't bother doc a man whose spirit and
leadership has made this program what it
is today
Oh anybody could have done it maybe
continued on a man whose brilliant and
sparkling personality has been reflected
into each and every one of us I have so
much of it go ahead a man whose age and
experience has proven invaluable to us
younger members of the Cavs that one he
could have left out oh well so here he
is folks the old Mother Hubbard of the
jello program Jack Benny
jalaw again this is Jack Benny talking
mold Mother Hubbard that's a fine
introduction on Father's Day Don as long
as you started out so beautifully why
didn't you finish with something
sentimental like here he is folks the
genial skipper of the good ship cello
Jack Benny now that would have been
swell well they tell you the truth Jack
that sounds a bit too corny oh well now
that you mention it it does sound a
little like one of phil harris's mental
nuggets there you go again old boy am i
glad this is the last broadcast you are
yeah next week I'll be out on the road
playing those one-night stands where
people appreciate me Phil you stay in a
town longer than one night and see what
happened so you start on the road next
weekend what's your itinerary plane
suits for the boys and the sport outfit
for me
well that was my fault
Phil and itinerary means your route what
towns you're gonna play oh well why
don't you come right out and ask me
instead of ringing in them new words new
words Phil the word itinerary is very
common I learned what it meant when I
was in the third grade you learn to
shade there too didn't you Mary I wasn't
in third grade that long go on they had
to give you a lecture day off so you
could vote all right go ahead keep it up
I suppose I had rheumatism when I was in
the third grade you spent your lunch
money on liniment if that's what you
mean
you never stop do you Mary if I'm a big
dodo like you try to make me out how
come I'm the star of this program
because you're a great comedian you have
a marvelous personality and you know
show business from A to Z oh thanks more
like it
say Phil oh brother
[Applause]
don't spoil it
say Phyllis I started to ask you before
I was sent back to third grade what's
your route what what towns you gonna
play well tomorrow night we open in San
Bernardino then we go to Santa Barbara
then Long Beach then San Diego I see
then the following night we go to Fall
River Massachusetts Paul River
Massachusetts are you gonna get there in
one night from San Diego I don't know
it's as much of a drive you hear that
fellas what a schedule that'll be a fine
vacation touring the country with those
18 downbeat derelicts say Don what are
you planning to do on your vacation take
a trip somewhere well Jack this may come
as a sort of a surprise to you but I'm
going to make a picture for Harry
Sherman at Parramatta it's a Western oh
well I'll be done so you gonna make a
Western eh are you gonna write a horse
down yes sir and you ought to see that
animal it's a beauty so was Jack Straw
hackle you sat on it
yeah 450 well tell me about your picture
down is it an interesting story Albury
you see I am Sheriff slim of rattlesnake
Gulch and there's a mob of outlaws that
come in town one night to rob the bank
robbed the bank hey yeah but I'm having
a story changed so that now they break
into a grocery store and steal some
jello oh that makes me fighting back
well I should imagine it would
what's a bank so what so what what
happens Don
well I jump on my horse and follow the
outlaws to their hideout
I stay and I'm almost within sight of
them when suddenly my horse goes lame oh
that's too bad so I continue by foot Don
you forgot to get all and what happens
next well to make a long story short I
captured the bandits bring back the
jello Mary the grocer's daughter and we
have six delicious children tell me
don't tell me I can't imagine a kid
named lemon Wilson well it sounds like a
fascinating story and I wish you luck
Don and now ladies and gentlemen going
from buck Wilson rides again to our
vocal interlude a Dennis day our young
tenor will offer Dennis isn't here yet
he isn't I think he'd be on time for our
last program look Jack there he is
sitting out in the audience with his
mother
where do that lady with a little boy on
her lap well I'll be darned hey Dennis
what are you doing out there I'm
watching the program well get up here
your honor okay come on ma hmm what have
to bring his mother with him Oh Jack
it's our last show what do you care
she's always got a chip on her shoulder
Oh what do you mean good evening mrs.
day
good evening mr. Benny I'm so happy to
see you
well you certainly don't look it you see
you see what I mean
there you know mrs. de I don't like to
say this but since you've stayed away
from the program Dennis and I've been
getting along fine and he's improved
tremendously
he's got more volume to his voice more
assurance and more poise then why don't
you give him more money because he's
young yet
that's why Shirley Temple made a million
dollars before she was ten years old
Charlie temperatures will hang some
curls on your brat and wheel dicker
now look mrs. de give me a little credit
I've developed your son into being a
first-class comedian then he oughta have
more jokes to tell oh now you want jokes
for them well for your information mrs.
day there are just so many jokes in our
script and when this pack of wolves come
in here Sunday night your lamb is lucky
if he gets to sing and now Dennis how
about a song okay
gee mr. Benny you're not a bit afraid of
my mother are you your mother no the
woman don't live that you're afraid of a
tiger Mary I don't like those nicknames
go ahead and sing Dennis
mrs. Dave would you please take your
seat in the audience
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
on your little swing I heard you sing to
the live long day
[Music]
then this traffic theme
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
your songs are tender feel that wasn't
meant to sing
[Applause]
[Music]
- singing for your name but it's your
fate wait what
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
that was blue lovebird from Lillian
Russell sung by Dennis day a great song
from a great picture by the way Dennis
did you see the picture yeah
and I was wondering mr. Benny do you
think Alice Faye on the screen was as
beautiful as the real Lillian Russell so
they say of course I never knew Lillian
Russell uh-huh
Mary I'm warning you
I suppose I knew Diamond Jim Brady too
didn't get any on you Mary I was just
about to make an announcement concerning
our cast next year and a certain clever
kiddo may be cut out now sit down yes
mr. Benny and now ladies and gentlemen
before we conclude this final broadcast
I would like to announce that on Sunday
October the 6th Mary go away we will
return to the air for the same sponsor
at the same time and with the same cast
Mary filled on Denis Andy and Rochester
who is now touring in vaudeville it's
deadly Jack who's taking over our summer
show has it been settled yet
yes Don the all rich family's gonna move
in for 3 months as a matter of fact
young Henry Aldrich is dropping in here
in just a little while I want you all to
be very nice to him you'll probably be
scared stiff in front of a microphone or
scared in front of a microphone why
Henry Aldridge is a veteran in radio why
he can't be just a kid sure but he's had
his own program for the past two years
oh gee he's funny funny because he does
he do comedy haven't you heard about him
Jackson why that kids are riot he's
terrific yes and he's young
[Laughter]
hmm yeah you want to watch out for that
boy remember the old saying make way for
tomorrow well if he thinks he's coming
out here to steal my oh I'm not worried
but then what's my sponsor thinking of
putting another comedian in my place
I'll take it easy Jack the boy won't
hurt you he's only taking your place for
three months oh that's right
a lot can happen in three months what do
you mean well suppose at the end of the
summer Henry Aldridge goes to our
sponsor and says look I did all right on
the summer show why make a change what
why not keep the all rich family but why
let go of a good thing yeah what do you
need with Benny why the little
double-crosser
I'll punch that all rich kid right in
the nose now Jack don't get excited the
kid doesn't mean any harm then why is he
trying to put me out of work especially
at my age oh my back
all of a sudden you're old and feeble oh
no I'm not
well fellas that's the way they want it
all right heaven knows I try to
entertain the American public what
that's why if I guess like Jack what are
you talking about you'll be back on this
program next October
don't try to soften the blow I can see
the handwriting on the wall thank heaven
I've saved a few pennies you guys if you
got that fortune in pennies
it's no time for jokes meri and I think
that a little squirt like that all rich
kid can come along come in and take away
all that I built up through years of
possum come in come in well hello mr.
Benny I'm Henry Aldridge oh you are eh
[Applause]
you got a nice hand there didn't he yeah
that's the public for you fickle little
while ago they were doing that for me
well young man you can very nicely get
right out of this studio get out of this
studio boy our sponsor said I don't care
what our sponsor did you don't start
working on this program until next week
so scram yeah but I flew all the way
here from New York just to be on your
show tonight I don't care if you did get
out for mr. Buckey nothing get out
before I throw you out
you know what's going on teach you to
take my job away
look at him stand in there so darn funny
/ so why don't you go ahead and tell a
joke go ahead make me laugh
gee whiz mr. Benny I can't understand
all this I came all the way to from New
York to be with you tonight
okay I'm bewildered everybody told me
you were such a nice fellow I heard a
little bit about you too buddy now
please get out of here Oh Jack you have
to fall for everything we were only
kidding you why of course you don't have
to worry Jack it's just a rib rib
nothing I can look right at that boy and
see he's got talent can't pull the wool
over my eyes hair either why I'm worried
enough all wake up Jackson this kid
isn't trying to take your job my
goodness mr. Benny I I think you're the
greatest comedian in the world you're my
ideal I am a honest way I'd rather go
without supper than miss you on Sunday
night oh yeah
Wow oh I always listen why I know all of
your stuff by heart Oh laughs your dukes
crab here Bobby Jack what's the matter
with you calm down calm down
I just heard him admit he was stealing
my stuff oh no what you misunderstand me
mr. penny all I meant was you're so
funny that I can't help but remember
everything you do oh I see well I'm
sorry I made that passe
so you think I'm pretty funny a kid yes
sir I think Phil Harris is very amusing
too oh you're doing but when it comes to
class you got him beat a mile oh Henry I
have to admit that Phil is a little
corny oh you're both corny but you have
more finesse
now look Henry see what I told you the
kids a panic now look Henry there are a
couple of rather personal things I want
to talk to you about I'll tell you what
lets you and I run down to the drugstore
I want a sandwich anyway I'll talk to
you there okay well so long everybody on
your summer show Thanks
goodbye Mary give me a kiss kiss Henry
oh so long I'll see you later come along
Henry
well Henry here's here's what I want to
talk to you about you see I do a comedy
show nine months out of the year now
you're coming on for the summer and I
think our audience would like a contrast
what do you mean mr. Benny well why
don't you do a dramatic show or read
poetry or something well but you see the
Aldridge family has been very successful
on the air we want to continue with it
but Henry people get tired of laughing
all the time why don't you introduce a
serious note you know make people cry
cry mr. Bennett sure that sob stuff goes
over big I smell a rat Oh bull look
Henry here's another idea have you ever
considered doing a sort of an adventure
serial something with suspense an action
for instance look you can be lost in the
jungle savages and wild animals of the
ether you know make a real thriller out
of it no comedy eh
no not in the jungle Henry well I don't
think our sponsor would like that oh
well here's the drugstore let's go in
and have something look Henry don't you
want to show this sponsor how versatile
you are I want to get laughs mr. Benny
just like you do oh hey buddy give me a
tuna fish and peanut butter sandwich
okay let's try it again
now look look Henry Henry let me paint a
picture for you say for instance you're
lost in the jungle and week after week
people will be tuning in to find out
what's happening to you they're worried
about you they'll be on edge did the
golden dragon get Henry they'll say well
how the cannibals got him think of that
I'll have a chocolate soda but Henry
vanilla ice cream
now look Henry forget about the junk
here's another idea for you you're an
office boy on a big new city newspaper
you're just dying for a break you want
to be a reporter see uh-huh well one day
there's a big fire in the building next
door and Millicent Mandalay the girl
you're gonna marry when you're 21 is
trapped in this burning building you're
screaming Henry Henry happy he'll know
so listen so hearing her cries you
dashed right into the blazing inferno
think of it Henry flames to the right
ear planes to the left of you
[Applause]
and now here's our recipe for keeping as
cool as a cucumber this summer it's a
swell new jell-o recipe called cucumber
pineapple salad why there's an even
breezy refreshing sound of the name
itself and believe me here's one time
when there really is something in a name
finely diced pieces of crisp cucumber
golden wedges of juicy pineapple and
clear emerald lime jell-o yes sir it's
enough to make the laziest summer
appetite perk right up and say more and
better yet it's so simple and easy that
it's practically making itself just
prepare one package of lime jell-o in
the usual way and chilled until slightly
thickened next fold in a cup of diced
cucumbers and one slice of canned
pineapple cut into wedges if you use
fresh pineapple be sure to cook it then
mold and serve on lettuce and there it
is friends a bright colorful salad with
a grand a tantalizing taste just the
thing for warm weather meals which must
be light yet delicious so tomorrow enjoy
this new jell-o salad the delightful
combination of cool tingling cucumbers
and golden pineapple tucked into a
glistening mold of tempting lime jell-o
[Music]
this is the last number of the last
program and the current jello series and
we'll be with you again next October 6
at the same time meanwhile I hope you
will all enjoy the all rich family
starring Ezra stone beginning next week
before signing off I'd like to thank our
listeners everywhere and the members of
my cast for their splendid cooperation I
would also like to thank my author's
bill Morrow and ed Malloy who work with
me in the preparation of my material and
oh yes I think I better thank Azra stone
- you're welcome buck good night folks
see you next fall the truth'll is next
lender to the average family same time
same station this is a national
broadcasting company