oh the jello program starring Jack Benny
with vari Livingston Phil Harris Dennis
day and yours truly Don Wilson the
orchestra opens a program with pinch me
you know one secret of planning of
successful meal ladies and gentlemen is
to finish with a flourish with a really
swell dessert in fact that's one reason
so many people like jello because it
always winds up the meal in a grand
style with a burst of color and a touch
of rich lingering flavor take cherry
jello for example nothing makes a
prettier picture than a shimmering
bright red mould of cherry jello with
golden sliced peaches glowing in its
depth and what a tangy refreshing flavor
as tempting is the real ripe fruit
itself a solid satisfying goodness that
you want to enjoy again and again no
doubt about it a dessert like that
certainly adds the final glowing glory
to any meal so when you plan dinner
tomorrow plan to finish with a flourish
with jello in any of jello six delicious
flavors well they just be sure of
getting genuine jello when you buy look
for the big red letters on the box they
spell jello and jello spells a tree
[Music]
that's why pinch-me played by the
orchestra and now ladies and gentlemen
Oh don don did he'll get here yet not
yet Jack and now ladies and gentlemen
this being our first program of the new
year we bring you that holdover from
1939 Jack Benny
[Music]
jellal again mr. Jack Benny talking and
Don I didn't mean to interrupt you
before but I'm a little anxious for Phil
to get here he is not in the hall is he
no Jack what's the trouble oh no trouble
Don that is I hope not you see I made a
wager with Phil on the Rose Bowl game
last Monday and he lost he'll be so mad
you'll go nuts
oh so you bet a couple of bucks on
Southern California huh couple of bucks
nothing I bet $50 on SD 50 stacks I
pardon me I must be in the wrong studio
Mary come back there's nothing wrong
with my risking $50 of course I was
pretty sure that I'd win I'll bet you're
on a suicide note just in case I did
nothing of the kind anyway Don just
wait'll Phil gets here I doubt if he
even shows up oh he'll show up jack well
don't start ribbing him or anything
because I'll have a tough enough time
collecting as it is oh hello Dennis
hello mr. Benny did you enjoy the Rose
Bowl game last Monday I certainly did I
didn't see you Dennis where were you
sitting well it was the darndest
coincidence mr. Benny you know last
Monday I was 20 years old yeah I had to
eat right on the 20-yard line
Wow well that is a coincidence there
weren't very good though I missed half
the place oh that's a shame too bad you
were in Jack's age you could have seen
everything
[Music]
marry that may have been a brilliant
remark but it doesn't happen to fit I
was sitting behind the goalposts
way way up in the 75th roll seventy
fifth row did you enjoy the game jack oh
it was all right till the last quarter
what happened there my radio broke and
the clouds rolled in what a seat I had
did you have any bets on the game mr.
Benny just won but I anticipate a bit of
trouble collecting you know Dennis I bet
$50 with Phil Harris and waiting his ear
when he has to pay up oh what a bum
sport you know he's the kind of a fella
quiet Jack here he comes now oh yeah
watch me needle them
well hello gambler how's the old
Tennessee fan today fine Jackson and
here's your 50 bucks you deserve a kid
you sure can pick them
oh boy is he burned up you know jack I
looked for you right after the game I
wanted to pay you then oh sure sure I
bet you did I can just see yeah well
here yard
Jackson aren't you gonna take the money
it's all yours kid oh boy what a sore
loser see what I told you fellas what's
going on here if you don't want it I'll
put the dough back in my pocket you see
backing out eh I thought so what are you
talking about I lost the bet and I want
to pay off here's your $50 I won't take
it
why not because you're a welcher and you
can't fool me
[Music]
that's why Jack do you mean to say that
you're not going to take the money
Phil's offering you no I'm not that's
liable to knock the war right off the
front page
[Music]
listen Mary I wouldn't accept a dime
from a guy that takes the attitude he
does what Jack are you crazy the man
offered you the money for time but he
could do it like a gentleman he doesn't
have to come in here and throw it on the
floor who threw it on the floor it's
right here in my hand you can't block me
Harris
go ahead and sing Dennis I'll collect
from that guy had to attach his salary I
met small-timers before but gee mr.
Benny I saw mr. Harris offer you the
money he wants you to take it sure he
wants me to take him you know why don't
you why because when I bend over to put
it in my shoe he'll take me
[Music]
I'm wise I know all the tricks sing
Dennis it's about time somebody exposed
that guy
[Music]
[Applause]
last night we met and I freely Marv you
yet with a wind and the rain
they're embalm this how you safe when we
kiss will the wind and the rain
more rain what a somber wind water boys
the night was dark and stormy but how
could my heart with your
[Music]
last night we met
[Music]
everybody we will the wind and the rain
in your
I held you tight as you wish my good
night with a wind and
your head
[Music]
my favorite memory
of you
[Music]
there in vomit how you were fired when
we kissed will the wind and the rain
[Music]
if a wind and
in your
[Music]
[Applause]
that was with the wind and rain in her
hair sung by Dennis day and accompanied
by a deadbeat and his orchestra and now
and now ladies and gentlemen what do you
mean dead feet here's your $50 take it
don't rush me I'll get in my own way and
our folks if we can get back to the
spirit of our program tonight the Benny
slot-machine players will hit the
jackpot with their version of Frank
Lloyd great production that maritime
epic rulers of the sea now I will play
the project last week you made a big
announcement that we were going to do
Golden Boy tonight
well we were gonna do Golden Boy Don but
I've decided to let it go for a while
and I know why Mary that's not the
reason anyway why the sudden switch Don
please now I will play the part come on
Mary tell us why doesn't Jack want to do
Golden Boy well Mary here's what
happened
Oh we could go Saturday night Jack
called me up and asked me if I'd like to
over the rollerball for dinner as
planets had to work he did not anyway we
got to the bowl about nine o'clock and
had a table Wayne back what fell
couldn't see us and just as we are
finishing dinner iced well do you like
the food Mary yeah he is crowded in here
isn't it it sure is
hey waiter bring me another cup of
coffee please I don't know about that
mr. Benny go get it
yes sir gee whiz Jack just because a
second cup of coffee is free you don't
have to have five of them marry at all
averages up how many people even take
the second cup cigars cigarettes and
novelties cigarette Oh girlie give me a
cigar will you please yes sir what can a
couple of those Santa fé built Mart
by the way what's that you've got on
your tray they're tied up in that pink
ribbon that's a lock of mr. Harris's
hair $0.50
[Music]
well I don't want it you better take it
this is the last one lesson we don't
share him again for a month
no just thanks just the same imagine
that Mary is that filled corny cigars
cigarettes corn get in the mood for
selling lots of his hair now isn't that
awful
yeah wonder what time the floor show
goes on oh look there's more awareness
sales announcements getting ready to
introduce Phil oh yeah good evening
ladies and gentlemen welcome to the
Wilshire Bowl and our folks it gives me
great pleasure to introduce to you our
master of ceremonies and comedian oh boy
that maidens dream on the beam Phil
Harris
[Music]
[Applause]
how does he rate a reception like that
well feels very popular thank you thank
you thank you
jellow again this is smiling Phil Harris
talking jello again he got that from me
you remember me folks your favorite
comedian and the star of that paramount
picture man of our town mmm you got that
from Rochester
[Music]
quiet I want to hear this great comedian
hey Mort yes bill who is that lady I've
seen you walking down the street with
last night that was my grandmother not
bad oh my
[Music]
and they're laughing yet they fill I
heard you were in the hospital last week
yes I was more it's pretty thick yeah no
pretty nurse
hey waiter bring me another cup of
coffee I'm going to get even somehow
I'll have one with you pull up a chair
[Music]
Mary Mary I can't understand why people
laugh at Phil his jokes aren't funny
they're happy because there's no cover
charge that must be it and now folks
we'll be back in a little while with
some sizzling dance music see you later
yeah thank heaven hey Mary let's pay the
check and get out of here
okay I'll match you this time
no tonight it's my treat come on let's
go
all right Oh Jack look is that barbara
stanwyck sitting over there we're right
over there at the ringside table oh yeah
she's with another couple
I wonder where Bob Taylor is I don't
know I'm going over and say hello to her
you know Barbara Daley of course I know
her and say Mary I've got a great idea
as long as we're gonna do Golden Boy
next Sunday wouldn't it be marvelous if
I could get Barbara to play her original
role it's your one I'm go right over and
fix it see you in a minute you know
Barbara the shame Bob had to work at the
studio tonight
it certainly is Barbara well he's
finishing a picture and they're working
overtime
[Music]
you know Lillian I was telling Bob only
this morning then he'll well hello
Barbara hello as I was saying earlier I
told me this morning that oh wow how are
you Barbara I'm fine thank you
she is sure to surprise running into you
here at the wheelchair bowl where's Bob
he's busy at the studio I expect him
later
oh are you working here no no no I just
drop in for a cup of coffee are these
folks relatives of yours oh pardon me
I'm sorry mister mrs. Kendal this is Ben
Bernie
[Music]
well that's Jack Bernie
I mean Bennett how do you do how do you
do you know mr. Benny I always listen to
your program is Miss Livingston with you
this evening
yes mrs. Kendall she's sitting right
over there with the waiter well Barbara
it's your a surprise seeing you here
where's Bob tonight I told you he was at
the studio oh oh that's right
busy busy busy yeah yeah good be busy
busy well it sure is surprise yes sir oh
look the arcs is about to start a number
would you like to dance Barbara not that
I know of
Oh oh come on all right folks grab your
partners
we're gonna play a little number
entitled the Sun shines bright in my old
Kentucky home because there's a big hole
in the roof oh come on Barbara let's
dance come on all right wait till I get
my shoe on oh yeah yeah
[Music]
wife Barbara you dance too finally thank
you but you're going a little fast
aren't you just hang on Pappy you're
priceless
[Music]
in this well Barbara see I just love
dancing do you always puff like this no
no I'm just a little excited you know
when I was a kid back in Waukegan
I used to bullfight trip sorry Barbara
oh that's alright
somebody must have shoved me yeah so
crowded but you know as I was saying
Barbara when I was a kid in Waukegan I
used to I tripped again yeah I don't
know what's the matter with me tonight
I'm generally very graceful in fact I
got medals for dancing well take them
off they're tearing my dress
[Music]
you have a marvelous sense of humor see
Barbara look at the way that guy leads
an orchestra how he loves to show off I
like his style very much hello Phil well
well Barbara how are you bad I'm fine
thank you
oh by the way bill this is Jack Benny
how do you do you work for me how do you
do yes
see you later corny I call him corny
what does he call you he wouldn't dare
come on Barbara I've got something very
important I want to ask you but dance
some more
one two
[Music]
so you see Barbara that would be a
terrific novelty what do you say well
I'd love to help you out jack but do you
think it would go over why of course I
go over just imagine you playing your
original role in Golden Boy on my
program with me playing opposite you
that's not intrigue you doesn't that do
something to you
doesn't that thrill you keep mentioning
things
[Music]
good then it's a deal now let's see
when can we rehearse now wait a minute
now how about rehearsing Tuesday
afternoon at my house oh oh all right
then it's a date my house three o'clock
Tuesday
I must tell Mary oh there she is dancing
with the waiter Oh Mary Mary
[Music]
well anyway Don Jack made a date with
Barbara for Tuesday afternoon at his
house did she show up sure she did then
why isn't Jack doing golden-boy tonight
well I tell you what happened Mary
forget it I get over to Jack's house by
a quarter three and you should have seen
him he was so excited all he kept saying
was Rochester have you picked the
sandwiches
Rochester you fix the sandwiches yes
boss here they are what's in them this
is some of that place give them Terry
which we also serve for Christmas oh
[Music]
that bird has made more farewell
appearances than Harry Lauder well I
don't want to serve that to miss Stanley
my goodness have we got any peanut
butter or something yes we'll make some
of those and Rochester when miss
Stanwyck arrives bring her right into
the library here okay boy and oh yes
take that copy of Shakespeare down from
the shelf dust it off open it to Hamlet
and put it on the table it'll make an
impression oh gee I hope I look all
right what do you think of my new suit
Rochester the coast beautiful balls but
don't you think you ought to put your
pants on
yeah get them quick yeah but don't come
in for a minute Mary I'm waiting for
something here's your pants boss bang
see that's a mighty good-looking outfit
I'm glad you like it you ought to buy
more brown suits mr. Benny they flatter
both of us
Rochester don't you dare put this on
until it starts to shine Mary you can
come in now what's going on Jack my pan
now Mary just for today I want you to do
me a favor please lay off the wisecracks
will ya okay but say yeah if you ought
to take that sign down from in front of
your house it looks awful
what sign the one that says today in
person Barbara Stanwyck what Rochester
did you put that sign up in front of the
house yeah I'll teach the neighbors to
hihat us darn right leave it up now Mary
when I'm rehearsing with Miss Tammy
today you can help me out by commenting
on how good I am
what should I do well when I finished a
very dramatic line you yell out Bravo
Nordahl impress Barbara Bravo what does
that mean never mind what it means just
say Bravo why can't I say pew
[Music]
don't you dare now I want everything to
be that must be her now answer the
Rochester I mean answer the door
Rochester ok Bojack control yourself I'm
alright where's my cigar in your ear oh
yeah
now remember Mary thank you
Barbara come right in well this is a
surprise surprise yes I mean that is
welcome home I mean make yourself at
home
I mean you mean hello that's it oh by
the way Barbara this is Mary Livingston
how do you do miss Livingston
I knew Bob Taylor before you did
[Music]
marry don't mind her Barbara she's
always like that I know she used to sell
me hoes at the may company
[Music]
well that's a good one
[Music]
serves you right well let's go on with
the rehearsal did you bring the script
with you Barbara yes and as the play is
very long I've selected one scene which
I think would be ideal for both of us
oh you mean it's equally important yes
it's that scene where Lorna pleased with
Joe to give up fighting and go back to
his violin I see and I'm Joe unless
you'd rather be Lorna oh no no no no Joe
is all right I'm Joe hello Joe what do
you know I just got back Mary
[Music]
well Barbara I think we'd better get
going with our rehearsal all right now
here's your pot it's on page 93 hmm oh
yes well what a beautiful copy of
Shakespeare you have here are you fond
of his place oh yes I often while away
an hour or so perusing Hamlet Macbeth as
you like it The Tempest travel not yet
oh yes I'm quite I'm quite fond of
Shakespeare well that's that should I
put it back on the shelf
[Music]
nevermind Rochester bring him some tea
and sandwiches yes
now alright Barbara I'm I'm ready to
rehearse let's take it from the top of
the page here the scene where I'm trying
to get you out of the fight racket you
have the first line oh yes Joe I'm going
Lorna don't read Joe just read the line
[Music]
oh yes excuse me hmm
I'm going Lorna don't go Joe you must
listen to me
when I first saw you I didn't care what
you did I thought you were just a
fighter I didn't love you then I didn't
care whether you lived or died or what
happened to you I didn't care if I ever
saw you again I'm going on I love you
now you're part of me
what can you become a fighter taught me
something I've seen you get a hard
Sheldon tough or you shouldn't be in the
ring Joe it's not for you you belong in
your home in your home with your violin
I'm going on Joe and you love me you'll
listen to me I know why you're doing
this you're bitter and callous and
hard-boiled but Joe don't you remember
that night you spoke of music and what
it meant to you how you loved your
violin you knew what was right then how
people should live oh don't give up
fighting please please I'm going Lorna
[Music]
Jack read that write that I'm going
Lorna I'm tired of saying it the same
way
Thea gets monotonous fine part well
you've got a very dramatic speech coming
up it's the next line oh yes I didn't
see it
go ahead Barbara what do you say Oh Joe
will you give up fighting Joe you don't
need the money
it isn't the money I got plenty Rob oh
and how Mara
I'm sorry Barbara I'll take it again it
isn't the money I got plenty Oh Joe yo
you must give up fighting
watch this Mary give up fighting while
you were the girl that liked champions
you were don't try to get even with me I
made up my mind to win the lightweight
crown music Joe you know that I can't
play anymore I got the hands of a
fighter
they've been soaking Brian for a year
and there's hard as nails
they're good for only one thing now
slugging slugging my way to the fiber
I tell you Lorna why what's the matter
you're supposed to be a fighter not
little Eva oh wait a minute Barbara I
put a lot into that speech I felt the
part and I was very emotional I wasn't
carried away you keep out of it and go
get the tea your performance wouldn't
convince anybody
now Barbara aren't you getting a little
bit hasty yeah I might not be as good at
your act as an actor as your husband gee
whiz we can't all be Taylor
your father was why
now give me a give me a chance Barbara
I've never read this before let's go
back to my last line
Oh all right I'll try it once more
mm-hmm my hands are good for only one
thing now slugging slugging my way to
the title no no Joe you must give up
fighting you can't talk me out of it
Lorna I'm going don't go oh don't go
don't please don't go take me in your
arms kiss me my darling
[Music]
ha how was that Lorna Oh Joe Joe you
must give up kissing
I mean I can get better than that I was
a little nervous
Oh Jack it's no use you're a nice fellow
but you're a comedian we'd only make
fools of ourselves if we tried to do
this on your program but Barbara it's
only Tuesday we got plenty of time to
rehearse calling no believe me jack
rehearsing won't help any but Barbara
get only tea and sandwiches folks tea
and sandwiches tipping is not American
Rochester will you have a cup of tea
Barbara now thanks jack I'll just run
along he's not that bad you can leave
walk marry no kiddin Barbara have a cup
of tea we'll rehearse some more no thank
you
some other time Jack Oh Barbara please I
already announced we were gonna do
Golden Boy and I I was gonna spring you
as a surprise well let's wait till
spring things are brighter than well
that's the way you feel about it thanks
just the same you're welcome goodbye
Mary goodbye so long jack so long oh by
the way Jack you can take that sign down
now
well there she goes and I'm going to
goodbye slugger I can't understand why I
didn't play that scene right yeah I know
I can do it
Rochester Friedman stand we sparred will
you start right here okay no Joe you
must listen to me I made a mistake I
love you Joe you're part of me I can't
play my violin anymore Lorna I got the
hand of a fighter it's open Brian for a
year the heart is nails they're good for
only one thing now
clucking plugging my weight so there you
are Don that's the reason we're not
going to do Golden Boy tonight
well that's a shame it would have been a
great show don't worry Don I've been
soaking my hands and Brian all week I'll
get her yet play pill
[Music]
one thing jello has always been famous
for ladies and gentlemen is the wide
variety of ways it can be served and
desserts salads and many other grande
gelatin treats but did you know that you
can also use jello to make the finest
fruit or vegetable relishes you ever
tasted
for example jello cranberry relish
bright crimson cranberries gleaming in a
golden mold of clear lemon jello and
marvelously easy to make all you do is
first dissolve one package of lemon
jello and 1/3 cup of sugar and 1 pint of
hot water chill until slightly thickened
and fold in two teaspoons of horseradish
and two cups of raw cranberries which
have been put through the food chopper
then mold and you have a delicious
relish a spritely combination of
delicate lemon jello and the spicy
tartness of juicy ripe red cranberries
serve with roasts or cold meat blends a
tasty tingle to their enjoyment
so tomorrow order some lemon jello from
your grocer and add an appetizing accent
to dinner with jello cranberry rallies
[Music]
Thank You Barbara and good night
everybody
[Music]