0:00: The 37 voices to which you are now listening represent the combined personnel of announcers employed by the mutual Columbia and National Broadcasting Networks in Hollywood. 
 0:15: Tonight we speak as one voice, a voice which reflects the sentiment of an entire nation when it says infantile paralysis must go. 
 0:35: For the march of dimes. 
 0:43: Infantile paralysis need not be. 
 0:48: To let it run wild is a crime. 
 0:52: You can do your bit to get rid of it. 
 0:57: Brother, can you spell a. 
 1:12: This is Eddie Cantor, whose privilege it is to introduce tonight some of the greatest personalities in the entertainment world assembled here to ask your cooperation in the March of Dimes, a nationwide drive for funds with which to fight the germ of infantile paralysis. 
 1:28: Maestro Meredith Wilson lifts his baton, and America calls. 
 1:49: I I thank God. 
 1:57: I Have you seen your And I The Mexico Oh the Have you seen your A Yeah. 
 2:52: Great. 
 3:06: Certain statue with its joy and torture. 
 3:25: You're not. 
 3:42: You know, ladies and gentlemen, there were so many stars anxious to appear for this worthy cause tonight that we didn't even Eddie, Eddie, we didn't know how to get them more than one program. 
 3:51: Hey, candor. 
 3:52: So we, Eddie, introduce me now, will you? 
 3:54: I'm in a hurry. 
 3:54: I've got to rush back to do my own show. 
 3:56: Oh, Jack, ladies and gentlemen, it's Jack Benny. 
 4:06: You know, I'm surprised to see so many people out here with my own show going on. 
 4:10: Oh, sure. 
 4:12: Well, thanks, Eddie. 
 4:12: I'm sorry that I had to butt in like you like this, but I didn't want to miss the opportunity of appearing here tonight, and still I have to get back in time to do my own program, though this thing has had me worried all day. 
 4:22: Relax, Jack. 
 4:23: What if your program does go on once without you? 
 4:25: It might be good anyway, you know. 
 4:27: What do you think I've been worrying about? 
 4:30: Well, so long, Eddie. 
 4:31: Wait a minute, wait a minute. 
 4:32: Your studio is only a block from here and you've got 20 minutes to make it. 
 4:35: What's the rush? 
 4:36: Look, Eddie, so many things can happen in one block. 
 4:39: Look, in the first place, when I leave here and go downstairs, I'll have to stop and sign hundreds of autographs, you know. 
 4:44: Don't worry, I fixed that, Jack. 
 4:46: Be nobody at the back door. 
 4:47: All right, then I'll go out the front door. 
 4:50: Wait a minute, for heaven's sakes, you've got 20 minutes. 
 4:53: All right, I've got 20 minutes. 
 4:54: In the first place. 
 4:55: I haven't had my dinner yet. 
 4:56: All right, how long does it take you to eat? 
 4:58: It isn't the eating. 
 4:59: I've got to borrow the money from you, and you know how long that takes. 
 5:03: Yeah, you'll be lucky to make next week's show. 
 5:05: Look, look, that I know, but look, Eddie, all I intended to do was to come in for just 5 minutes, tell one joke, and get out. 
 5:12: One joke should take 5 minutes. 
 5:14: Eddie, when I get a laugh, they laugh. 
 5:18: Well, so long. 
 5:19: I'll see you later. 
 5:20: Jack, Jack, will you stop walking up and down like that? 
 5:22: Are you nervous or are you picketing me? 
 5:23: What are you doing? 
 5:24: Am I carrying a sign? 
 5:26: No, then I'm nervous. 
 5:27: Pat, look, I got to get away. 
 5:28: What time is it? 
 5:29: I haven't got my watch. 
 5:30: I'm sorry, Jack. 
 5:31: I haven't got one either. 
 5:32: Hey, buddy, what time is it? 
 5:33: Hey, if you two guys can't afford a watch, how do you think I can? 
 5:41: To answer that, but I gotta go. 
 5:42: So long, Eddie. 
 5:43: Well, wait, Jack, would you come here a minute? 
 5:44: Look, your studio is only a block from here, so take it easy. 
 5:48: Well, look, Eddie, you're forgetting. 
 5:49: We're on the 4th floor. 
 5:50: I gotta climb down 4 flights of stairs. 
 5:52: All right, there are 12 steps to each flight and 4 flights. 
 5:54: So how many steps are there? 
 5:56: Eddie, don't embarrass me. 
 5:58: Look, it's, it's not only the steps. 
 6:00: As soon as I walk out of the studio, I know I'm gonna slip and fall down. 
 6:03: How do you know you're gonna slip? 
 6:05: Cause when I came in, I was eating a banana. 
 6:08: The best thing I can do, Eddie, is to leave right away. 
 6:09: Thanks again for inviting me and introducing me, and I hope the show's a big success. 
 6:13: So on, Eddie. 
 6:13: So long. 
 6:13: Hey, Jack, wait a minute. 
 6:14: You left your hat here. 
 6:15: That's all right. 
 6:16: I'll pick one up wherever I eat, you know, I'll see you later. 
 6:18: So long. 
 6:25: Goodbye, Jack. 
 6:26: Thanks for your help and thanks to Rochester for allowing you to be with us. 
 6:31: Now friends, here is a man who is giving the Gables and tailors plenty of competition for the title Screen lover number one. 
 6:38: Who else could it be but that 16 year old dynamo, Mickey Rooney? 
 6:49: Hey, Mickey, you know, from what I've read in the papers, you've been going out with a different girl every night. 
 6:53: What goes on with you? 
 6:55: Well, Mr. 
 6:55: Cantor, it's like this. 
 6:56: I have plenty of dates, but no girls seem to fall for me. 
 6:59: I see. 
 6:59: Love finds Andy Harley. 
 7:01: Woohoo. 
 7:03: I was wondering if there was a laugh in that gag. 
 7:05: Now I know. 
 7:05: Well, look, Mickey, Mickey, tonight, tonight you've come here not as an actor but a songwriter. 
 7:10: You mean a song plugger? 
 7:12: I'm going to sing my own composition Have a Heart, which had 22 major plugs on the network last week. 
 7:16: Special arrangements are available by the Irving Berlin Publishing Company. 
 7:19: The stores are ordering it by leaps and bounds, and if your local dealer hasn't got it, Meredith, help me, it's a commercial. 
 7:31: Have a heart. 
 7:34: Let's give love another chance. 
 7:37: Let's renew our old romance tonight, 2 nights we meet again, though you pretended. 
 7:48: Our love had ended, but I can feel the flame, that same old flame, so have a heart, though you told me you don't care, that old feeling must be there tonight, and here we are together. 
 8:11: You know that this is the time to have a heart. 
 8:16: And say your mind. 
 8:23: Have a heart. 
 8:25: You know, folks, little feet were made to dance. 
 8:28: Come on, give those little kids a chance. 
 8:31: Won't you please? 
 8:32: Now, you know, this disease is something we've got to remove every tracer. 
 8:37: But for the grace of God in the heavens high, it might be you or I. 
 8:45: So have a heart. 
 8:46: Come on and send a dime. 
 8:48: It isn't much. 
 8:49: Help some little kid to walk without a crutch, please do. 
 8:54: So come on, let's all pull together. 
 8:58: Let everyone do his part. 
 9:01: Some kid may get to live if you'll have a home. 
 9:21: Thanks, Mickey Rooney. 
 9:23: Both you and your new song are a bit of all right. 
 9:25: You know, folks, it's always a real thrill to see a young comedian come along and quickly win his place in the public's affection. 
 9:31: After all, fellows like Jack Benny and myself can't last forever. 
 9:35: At least Benny can't. 
 9:37: It gives me great pleasure to bring you the star of Thanks for the memory, Mr. 
 9:41: Bob Hope. 
 9:50: Thank you very much, Eddie. 
 9:51: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and good evening my friends too. 
 9:56: I'm very happy to be here for I'm very happy to be here for such a wonderful cause. 
 10:03: Eddie Cantor, Jack Benny, Mickey Rooney. 
 10:04: Isn't this a great show? 
 10:06: I mean, up till now, huh? 
 10:09: I, what celebrities are here? 
 10:10: I saw Peggy Joyce out in the hall with 5 of her ex-husbands. 
 10:13: I asked her, I asked her if she was looking for this program, and she said, no, I'm looking for Hobby Lobby. 
 10:21: And I was, I was glad to see Eddie Cantor looking so well too. 
 10:25: I just want to say that there's no truth to the report that he's been trying for weeks to buy Sun Valley. 
 10:30: I, I don't know why Canada would want to go to Sun Valley. 
 10:35: The weather is nice here. 
 10:36: Of course, we had a slight washout yesterday, but I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say it rained hard, but they're thinking of putting a saucer under the Hollywood bowl. 
 10:48: I Of course, of course it never rains in California. 
 10:53: Occasionally the orange juice overflows, but Besides, they don't call it rain, they call it California champagne. 
 11:01: It comes down in buckets. 
 11:04: I set a mouse trap this morning and caught a herring, but you know a comedian. 
 11:09: You know, a comedian shouldn't kid about the weather out here. 
 11:11: After all, California has given them a good living with pictures and radio. 
 11:15: Well, if it wasn't for California, I wouldn't have a swimming pool in my living room this morning. 
 11:20: My dining room was so moist this morning, I had a sea elephant squirting back at the grapefruit. 
 11:28: But really California is a healthy place to live in. 
 11:30: In fact, it's so healthy, the hospitals have to run bank night to get customers. 
 11:34: Take, take Mickey Rooney, for example, he's always outdoor in that car of his. 
 11:38: He's got a swell car, just the thing for driving down Hollywood Boulevard, comes with the fenders already smashed in. 
 11:46: I went on a date with him the other night, just Mickey, myself and two girls. 
 11:50: The two girls were with Mickey. 
 11:51: I found out later. 
 11:56: He finally gave me one of the girls. 
 11:57: She was a pretty kid. 
 11:58: She looked like tobacco Road on a wet night. 
 12:03: Her face looked like it had worn out 4 bodies. 
 12:08: We took the girls. 
 12:10: I won't wait for that. 
 12:11: We took the girls for a ride and really Mickey thinks of everything. 
 12:15: He's got one of those new speedometers when he goes 50, a green light flashes on, when he goes 20, a blue light flashes. 
 12:20: Then when he parks, red flashes and the doors lock automatically. 
 12:28: But I want to tell you it's really healthy out here. 
 12:30: Families thrive. 
 12:31: For instance, 20th century is doing very well with the Jones family. 
 12:34: MGM has the Hardy family. 
 12:36: Sam Goldman has some of the Roosevelts being. 
 12:41: But you know, being vice president for Sam Goldman is better than having a political job. 
 12:45: You don't have to kiss any babies unless they're under contract, and I, I just heard the Republic pictures is dickering for Landon, but ladies and gentlemen, Thank you. 
 12:56: My time is up, and I just want to say that maybe you didn't know it, but Hollywood has been quarantined for the last year and a half. 
 13:01: That's a fact. 
 13:02: But everything is all right now. 
 13:03: The scarlet fever is over. 
 13:05: Good night, ladies and gentlemen. 
 13:14: Thank you, Bob Hope and now. 
 13:29: Nothing gives me more satisfaction than introducing Rudy Valley on a radio program. 
 13:33: When I look and see how young and handsome he is and then recall that it was he who started me in radio, I, I realized that I'm really nothing more than a child. 
 13:44: His friends call him one punch, Rudy. 
 13:45: At least he's different. 
 13:46: Valley is the only bandleader who doesn't swing for you. 
 13:49: He swings at you. 
 13:51: Rudy never starts a fight, but he can finish one. 
 13:54: Believe me, I presume that nearly everyone has ridden in a taxi cab at one time or another. 
 13:59: If you have, and if you're at all observant, you may have noticed that most cab drivers invariably inquire of you your destination in the very simple phrase where to. 
 14:07: Few of us, however, have any conception of the unpleasant side of a cab driver's existence, the headaches and heartaches that occur. 
 14:14: We've tried to incorporate some of these experiences in a composition by Jack Osterman. 
 14:18: And Elliot Jacoby. 
 14:20: I shall try to portray all the characters. 
 14:22: The splendid musical background will be directed by my pianist, Elliot Daniel. 
 14:26: The composition, where to? 
 14:49: I'm a taxi driver, always at the call of anyone who hails me. 
 14:52: It's just the law, that's all. 
 14:54: Traffic thin or thick, I can do the trick, and I'm handy in a storm, but when it's nice and warm, no one needs me. 
 14:59: Then I'm a robber, pirate. 
 15:01: See, I'm always being called out and sometimes getting bawled out, but when there's rain or snow and you've got somewhere to go, then you're glad to stop me. 
 15:08: I'm grateful when you dropped me. 
 15:10: I'm all gassed up and on my way. 
 15:12: Here's my first fare today. 
 15:14: He says, get in, sister. 
 15:16: I say, where to, mister? 
 15:17: He says through the park and go slow. 
 15:20: Yeah, I know how slow to go. 
 15:22: He says, close the window. 
 15:24: That's so I can't hear. 
 15:26: It's the same line of chatter year after year. 
 15:29: Who Where to? 
 15:32: Where to, here's a guy from the Ritz with one-way jeans and mitts. 
 15:37: Well, here's your story alight, my dear gloria. 
 15:39: Oh boy, here's a dime. 
 15:40: I have a good time. 
 15:43: Yeah, hot time on a dime. 
 15:45: While I get back in line. 
 15:46: Back is right. 
 15:47: The lineup is tight, but I got to get in. 
 15:50: I got to get in. 
 15:51: 80, you'll get back in line to spot his mine. 
 15:54: Then he's out of his cab with a mouthful of gab. 
 15:55: I know the lug with the stew in his mug. 
 15:57: A day, you're like a sock and a jar comes a voice from behind like a shark from the la. 
 16:05: Get back in there. 
 16:05: You're a ticket you'll get. 
 16:07: You're not the first book that I've ever met. 
 16:09: Sorry, my lady, wish you could stay, but her black as a black and you're in the way. 
 16:14: Where to Where to To It's Lexington again, Madison again, Broadway, Broadway, 5th Avenue again. 
 16:28: It's the same old story. 
 16:30: Night after night, clip after clip. 
 16:32: I'm only one flag and only one ship. 
 16:34: If it's down, it's clear sailing and everything's slick. 
 16:37: If it's up, I ain't whaling, but that meter don't tick. 
 16:40: Yeah, mister. 
 16:42: Oh ho, it's a drunk. 
 16:45: Shay, where's your hotel, don't want to join, but nothing too swell. 
 16:51: What is this radio cab? 
 16:53: Who's that singing valley? 
 16:56: It's not up my alley. 
 16:57: I got to hear someone sing and turn on Bing. 
 17:02: Sure this play is all right. 
 17:03: What do I owe you? 
 17:04: For what? 
 17:05: Think I'm a chump? 
 17:07: Put them up. 
 17:08: I'll show you. 
 17:09: I share only kidding, been drinking a lot. 
 17:12: Give me some change, all you got. 
 17:15: Hey, officer, I give him a 10. 
 17:16: He tried to shortchange me. 
 17:18: No, I am. 
 17:19: I'm send of the windpipes near his kin. 
 17:21: Here's my card running. 
 17:26: It's phonies like that put us some kids, send us home broke to the wife and the kids. 
 17:33: Taxi! 
 17:33: Taxi. 
 17:36: I'm a doctor, rush me quick. 
 17:37: Got a patient very sick. 
 17:38: Don't you worry about a ticket. 
 17:40: I can square it. 
 17:41: Give it, give it more. 
 17:42: Keep that that on the floor. 
 17:43: I'm nearly out of breath. 
 17:44: This is life I may be dead. 
 17:46: Come on, take out the lid and watch that truck ahead. 
 17:49: Come on, step up the face. 
 17:50: I've got to save this case. 
 17:51: Watch out. 
 17:52: Watch out. 
 17:55: Sorry, driver, I hurt. 
 17:56: Didn't mean to make a speed. 
 17:57: Watch that cut. 
 17:57: It's going to bleed. 
 17:58: Hurry, get some iodine. 
 17:58: That'll fix it cut up fine. 
 17:59: Here the $2 so I'll take another cab. 
 18:03: Nice of you drugstore guys to wipe the blood from my collar. 
 18:07: Don't want the old lady to holler. 
 18:09: What do I owe you? 
 18:11: $1? 
 18:13: Where to Where to Where to Get in that cab. 
 18:23: Don't want no cab. 
 18:24: Get going, get going, 7 it. 
 18:27: Think I'm going back to stern kind of him that filthy curd told him to stay away from his step on it. 
 18:33: those coppers off my track. 
 18:34: I got my cannon in your back. 
 18:35: One false move in your cold turkey. 
 18:37: Give it, guys. 
 18:37: Don't try to jerky, don't have left. 
 18:39: Don't fight. 
 18:39: Come on, go through that candlelight. 
 18:40: Come on, don't stop. 
 18:46: He's gone, officer. 
 18:47: Don't mind me, it's part of my racket, can't you see? 
 18:50: We always get it left and right, coppers, dead beats, day and night. 
 18:56: Can't be choosy. 
 18:57: Got to take anyone who yells, taxi. 
 19:01: Feels like my meter will soon start to tick. 
 19:04: My head's going around. 
 19:05: I feel kind of sick. 
 19:07: It's getting darker. 
 19:09: Do I say, copper, I'm asking you. 
 19:14: Where Where to Thank you, Rudy Valley. 
 19:39: Thank you very much. 
 19:40: This rendition of Where to certainly takes you out of the crooner class, believe me. 
 19:45: I want to tell you, ladies and gentlemen, Rudy Valley is really a good friend. 
 19:49: You know, last year when I was sick in New York, it was the first time I'd ever missed the broadcast, and Rudy took my place on my program, and I, I'll never forget it. 
 19:57: I was in my hotel. 
 19:59: Rudy was on my program. 
 20:00: I was lying in bed. 
 20:01: I had a little radio alongside of my bed and when Rudy Valley got the whole audience to sing, I love to spend. 
 20:08: Each Monday with you, I tell you, I, the tears were streaming down my face. 
 20:12: I was thinking to myself, there was Rudy Valley getting a check, which I would have got if. 
 20:20: Well, I can't help it. 
 20:21: I'm sentimental, you know. 
 20:24: And now here's a thrill for all of us, always charming and dignified, a splendid actress and a shining example of American womanhood, Norma Shearer. 
 20:45: Norma, we're right ready waiting for your message, if you please. 
 20:54: It is with more than joy. 
 20:55: It is with inspired determination that the women of America volunteer for this war against the common enemy of our nation's children, infantile paralysis. 
 21:04: Only a mother can know the fear that clutches the heart when the scourge of this disease threatens to strike down her loved ones and to leave behind the ache and agony of twisted, helpless little bodies. 
 21:16: Only a mother can feel the terror of the destroyer, which spares no class or race or color. 
 21:22: As a part of this campaign, women all over the country have held meetings to discuss plans to celebrate the president's birthday on January 30th. 
 21:30: To the first lady of the land, Mrs. 
 21:32: Eleanor Roosevelt, they have pledged their faithful support to the fight against infantile paralysis. 
 21:38: All of us can do our share. 
 21:40: Everyone can help by joining the March of Dimes, radio's own contribution to the campaign. 
 21:46: And by wearing a March of Dimes button or sending a March of Dimes birthday card to the president or mailing a dime direct to the president, it isn't how much we give that counts. 
 21:57: It is important that we all give for the sake of our nation's children, for the sake of our nation's mothers. 
 22:04: For the sake of America's future citizens. 
 22:08: Walter Winchell summed it all up better than any of us can when he said, If you buy a ticket and dance, then some little child who can't even walk may be able to dance some day. 
 22:34: Our compliments to Norma Shearer for a very inspiring message. 
 22:37: And now here is radio's outstanding piano team, Fairchild and Carol. 
 22:48: 2 boys, 2 pianos, and 2 minutes of Rudolph Rimmel's donkey serenade. 
 25:05: Now that you're through practicing, you want to play something, boys? 
 25:07: Oh, ladies and gentlemen, it's our great pleasure now to introduce one of radio's truly happily married couples, the creators of their particular brand of comedy. 
 25:17: They defy all lunacy commissions, George Burns and Gracie Allen. 
 25:31: Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. 
 25:34: well, Gracie, say hello. 
 25:36: I don't feel like when I don't feel like saying hello, I won't say hello. 
 25:40: Nobody can make me say hello. 
 25:42: Say hello hello. 
 25:44: , you, you, you remember Eddie Cantor. 
 25:48: Oh yes, I know him very well, but George, who is this? 
 25:52: , Eddie, maybe you can explain who we are. 
 25:55: Gracie, I'm Eddie Cantor. 
 25:57: Eddie Canter. 
 25:59: Eddie. 
 26:01: How do you pronounce it? 
 26:03: Eddie Cantor. 
 26:06: Your face is familiar. 
 26:08: But you don't remember the name. 
 26:09: I would if I heard it. 
 26:11: Did you, did you ever hear of Ida? 
 26:15: Ida, what station is she on? 
 26:19: Gray, Ida isn't on the radio. 
 26:22: Amos and Ida. 
 26:25: You, you take her. 
 26:27: Gracie, remember me, the 5 daughters. 
 26:30: Oh, the five daughters that Warner brother picture. 
 26:34: Oh, I saw that. 
 26:35: Which one were you? 
 26:37: That wasn't 5 daughters, that was 4 daughters. 
 26:40: Oh, one of them was too young to work, huh? 
 26:43: Yeah. 
 26:43: , which one is that, Georgie Jess? 
 26:47: Yeah, the youngest daughter, Georgie Jessel. 
 26:49: , the pretty ones. 
 26:50: Yeah, the one without the face, yeah. 
 26:53: George, can't we get on another subject? 
 26:56: Sure, Eddie, just ask Gracie how her brother is. 
 26:59: Then what happens? 
 27:00: She talks for about 200 years. 
 27:02: Pardon me, Ida, if you're listening, I'll be a little late for dinner. 
 27:05: Now, we'll start. 
 27:06: Gray, how is your brother? 
 27:08: Oh, which one? 
 27:09: The one who's living or the picture producer? 
 27:15: The picture producer. 
 27:16: Oh, the tall one. 
 27:18: Of course, you know, he's only my brother by marriage. 
 27:21: Wait a minute, your brother isn't married? 
 27:23: No, my mother and father are, and he's their son. 
 27:27: I'm waiting, Eddie. 
 27:29: So your brother is their son by marriage. 
 27:32: It's very interesting. 
 27:34: Of course, my mother hasn't seen much of my brother because he ran away from home when he was 39. 
 27:41: I'll, I'll bet it upset the folks when they found out that the kid was missing. 
 27:46: Well, they would have been upset, only my mother didn't know he was missing for 3 years. 
 27:52: Well, how did she find out? 
 27:54: Oh, well, every morning for 3 years, she brought up a plate of oatmeal to his room, and after 3 years, she noticed the room was filled with oatmeal. 
 28:02: So she said to herself, she says, the poor kid must be sick. 
 28:06: He's not eating. 
 28:10: Eddie, this is on me, folks. 
 28:13: That's how she found out that kid was missing. 
 28:16: Did she call the police? 
 28:18: No, she ate the oatmeal herself. 
 28:22: George, this one is on me. 
 28:24: Gracie, she ate all that oatmeal by herself. 
 28:27: Oh yeah, Mrs. 
 28:28: Phillips wouldn't eat it. 
 28:30: Mrs. 
 28:31: Phillips. 
 28:32: How did she get into this? 
 28:34: Who was Mrs. 
 28:34: Phillips? 
 28:37: She's the old woman who's been living with us for 5 years. 
 28:41: Well, who is she? 
 28:42: Yeah, we don't know. 
 28:45: I can't stand it. 
 28:46: I've got to get into this. 
 28:47: There's an old woman living in your house for 5 years and you don't know who she is. 
 28:52: My brother won her at a raffle. 
 28:56: He won her in a raffle. 
 28:58: He ran a raffle for a poor old woman, and my brother won. 
 29:05: That certainly is some family. 
 29:07: You said it. 
 29:11: Tracy, this family of yours, do you all live together? 
 29:14: Well, now there's my auntie and my nephew, and my daddy, my brother and my cousin. 
 29:18: They all sleep in one bed. 
 29:20: They all in one bed. 
 29:22: I'm surprised you. 
 29:25: I'm, I'm surprised your grandfather isn't sleeping with him. 
 29:28: Well, he wasn't sleeping with him, but he died, so they made him get up. 
 29:31: You. 
 29:34: Ed, you can have them. 
 29:36: No, no, you can keep him. 
 29:37: Oh, no, no, you take her. 
 29:39: No, I don't want them. 
 29:44: But before we go, I do want to say that we were very happy to be on this program tonight, and now, Gracie, say goodnight to everybody. 
 29:50: And Gracie, say goodnight to Edie Cant. 
 29:52: Oh, Eddie Cantor. 
 29:54: Now wait a minute, wait a minute. 
 29:56: Don't start in with that again. 
 29:58: You know this is Eddie Cantor. 
 29:59: Oh, Eddie Cantor, the movie star. 
 30:02: How about an autograph, Mr. 
 30:03: Cantor? 
 30:04: Aye, sure, sure. 
 30:05: Oh, lend me a pencil. 
 30:06: I want to give him an autograph. 
 30:09: You want to give him an autograph? 
 30:12: So Gracie, you've seen me in pictures. 
 30:14: Well, yes, I've seen you in all your pictures. 
 30:17: You play romantic leads, don't you? 
 30:19: Yes, I, I make love to all the movie stars. 
 30:23: Oh well, tell me, Mr. 
 30:24: Candor, is it a thrill to kiss Clark Gable? 
 30:40: Thank you, George and Gracie. 
 30:42: There they go, folks. 
 30:42: Look at them. 
 30:43: They're putting on their straitjackets and getting ready for home. 
 30:50: The song is Cole Porter's night and day, and the singer, the enchanting Moonglow girl Frances Langford. 
 30:57: . 
 31:11: On And To me your father. 
 31:24: no matter Where you I and. 
 31:37: Oh. 
 31:43: That is longing for you. 
 31:48: I go. 
 31:51: I In traffic's boom. 
 31:55: In the silence of my lonely room I think. 
 32:03: I and. 
 32:07: I and. 
 32:16: And all such a hungry. 
 32:23: And it's Will you let me spend my life making They. 
 32:46: Like the beat, beat, beat of the tom tom when the jungle shadows fall, like the tick tick tock of the stately clock as it stands against the wall like the drip drip, drip of the raindrop. 
 33:07: When the summer So And and. 
 33:28: Oh I There's no such a hungry. 
 33:41: And it's Let me spend my life making love to. 
 33:57: They. 
 34:19: She's a great singer. 
 34:20: I want to tell you that girl is going places. 
 34:22: And if I wasn't married, I'd be going with, I want to tell you what. 
 34:26: Now friends, if ever an individual found a warm spot in the heart of America, it's that down to earth philosopher from Van Buren, Arkansas, yes, Bob Burns. 
 34:45: Thank you. 
 34:46: Maybe we ought to have applause over where I work. 
 34:49: I don't know that. 
 34:53: You know, I was just sitting out there thinking, just looking at all this array of talent they've got here tonight, and I don't think it's right. 
 35:03: I don't think we have to put on a big ballyhoo like this just to get the people of the United States to chip in a few dimes. 
 35:12: I'm telling you, it, I believe the people will dig down in their pockets. 
 35:16: All they have to do is tell them what the dimes are for, and they'll give them. 
 35:21: But I want to tell you, I don't see why in the world a person would want to hang on to a little thing like a dime. 
 35:28: It it's such a little bitty old thing. 
 35:31: I, I, I found out how small it was when I tried to leave home one time. 
 35:38: I wanted to go to Fort Smith, and it's across the river and, and it cost a quarters to get from Van Buren on the ferry to Fort Smith, and I told a man, I said I ain't got but a dime, and he says, Well, if you haven't got but a dime, you're just as well off in Van Buren. 
 35:58: Now, I can't, I can't of course make the people dig down and give the dime, but I can't tell them what will happen if they do give it except make them feel better. 
 36:08: But I can tell you what'll happen to you if you don't give a dime. 
 36:12: You'll, you'll get to lose your social prestige like my uncle skinny Flint did. 
 36:18: That was the stingiest man I ever saw. 
 36:21: I'm telling you that man one time, he held on to a nickel so long when he finally did part with it, the buffalo gave him his paw. 
 36:37: Why, one time he kept a nickel in his pocket so long when he finally pulled it out, the buffalo got off and stretched. 
 36:46: But there's I know something about that man because he practically raised me and he told me when I was a little boy, he said the thing for you to do is save your money, and he says now I'm going to put this big red bank over here in the corner, and every time you get a quarter, you put the quarter in that bank, and when you get nickels and dimes, you haven't changed into a quarter and put them in that big red bank. 
 37:11: And I was 35 years old before I found out that that was a gas meter. 
 37:23: That uncle, that uncle used to come to me when I was a little trusting boy. 
 37:28: He used to come walking up to me every day of my life and hold both hands out in front of my face and say, Guess which one? 
 37:36: And I would point to one of his. 
 37:37: I was just a little trusting child, and I'd point to one of his hands and he'd open it and it wouldn't be nothing in it. 
 37:44: And the next day was the same, all my growing years, he'd hold out those two hands and say, guess which one? 
 37:51: And I never did hit the right one. 
 37:54: And finally, finally on his deathbed, he repented and he called me to his bedside and admitted that there never had been nothing in either hand. 
 38:03: But it was too late. 
 38:04: It, it had put a blot on my character. 
 38:07: I thought the world was against me, and finally when I asked my girl when I want to marry her and I asked her to give me her hand, she says, which one? 
 38:17: I said, I said it don't make no difference. 
 38:20: I won't get nothing anyhow. 
 38:29: Now then tonight I happen to know from experience that you can always go out and collect a little money with a piece of gas pipe at one way or the other, and yeah, I'm gonna try the easy way first and I'm just going to play it tonight, but if you don't chip in your dimes, I'm going to try the other way. 
 38:49: Go ahead, boys. 
 39:51: Act 12, Bob. 
 39:54: Rob, I want to tell you something with your bazooka and my voice, what a team we would make. 
 39:59: Thank you, Robin Burns. 
 40:01: You know, ladies and gentlemen, it's a far cry from the hills of Arkansas to Jitterbug Lane on fifty-Second Street in New York, but both have done their part to enrich America's wealth of entertainers. 
 40:12: From the latter, we give you the young lady who scored such a sensation with her swing version of Loch Lomond. 
 40:19: And who tonight glorifies our program with Benny Goodman's lullaby and rhythm, Miss Maxine Sullivan. 
 40:43: Hear my lullaby in. 
 40:46: Dream your dreams and wander with them. 
 40:49: Evening drums will come and take. 
 40:55: my lullaby in rhythm, all the breezes sigh in rhythm. 
 41:00: rest my love, let nothing wake you till the night. 
 41:06: stands the shadow. 
 41:12: Moon man's going to swing you up. 
 41:16: Swing you Hear my lullaby. 
 41:21: dream your dreams and wander with them. 
 41:24: Sandman's going to come and make you sleep. 
 41:28: My. 
 41:34: Please don't sing. 
 41:36: I. 
 41:40: unless it is. 
 41:45: Cause I don't like a lot. 
 41:51: Unless it is sound. 
 41:56: stars. 
 42:03: The moon man's going to swing you out. 
 42:09: hear my lullaby in rhythm, dream your dreams and wonder with them. 
 42:15: That's gonna come and make you sleep. 
 42:20: Good Good That's. 
 42:40: Thank you, Maxine Sullivan. 
 42:42: I, I don't know. 
 42:43: A lot of people knock swing. 
 42:45: I rather like swing. 
 42:46: It, it's got, it's got, it's, it's, it's modern. 
 42:48: It's 20th century. 
 42:49: It's life. 
 42:50: It's so vital, you know, I hate to hear people knock swing. 
 42:53: I went, a week before last, I was in New York. 
 42:56: I went to Benny Goodman's place at the Wall of Astoria where he was playing, of course, at first they wouldn't let me in. 
 43:01: My coat and pants matched. 
 43:06: And you know these youngsters, these jitterbugs, you know, they don't dance like we used to dance in the old I would take Ida to Webster Hall in New York and we do an old wall. 
 43:15: You know it's beautiful, honestly, and we thought we were hot stuff when we did a one step, you know, give her that stuff. 
 43:20: You should see these kids dance, not 10 minutes, not 15 minutes, a half an hour, 45, an hour at a time. 
 43:27: They dance till they fall exhausted, go out and get a blood transfusion, come right back again and do the same thing. 
 43:36: And it's still all right. 
 43:37: A lot of people say that maybe these children shouldn't be worshiping at the shrine of Tommy Dorsey and Benny Goodman, and I tell you, ladies and gentlemen, as a father and as a citizen, I'd much prefer to have these children hailing bandleaders than hailing bound leaders. 
 44:02: And now here's a young man whose boyish charm and mature talent have made him a screen idol throughout the world. 
 44:08: I refer to no less a personage than Tyrone Power, whom the public has just made king of the movies only last night. 
 44:15: And you know, recently upon his arrival in South America, the women literally tore the clothes off his back. 
 44:21: I bring you the South American Gypsy Rose Lee, Mr. 
 44:24: Tyrone Powell. 
 44:33: Ladies and gentlemen, There was a time in the history of the human race when disease was the master of man. 
 44:40: It blocked the march of progress for centuries. 
 44:42: The Black Plague once threatened to depopulate Europe and send all that was left of civilization back to the jungle from whence it came. 
 44:50: Construction of the Panama Canal was prevented for years by yellow fever. 
 44:54: Typhoid killed many times more men in war than weapons ever did. 
 44:58: Smallpox threatened every community. 
 45:00: Diphtheria was almost certain a sentence of death. 
 45:03: Now we can almost see the day when man will be the master of diseases. 
 45:07: Every one of these slinking slaughterers has been hampered or completely controlled. 
 45:12: By finding out how they worked, men were able to defend against them, but two baffling blights remain cancer and infantile paralysis. 
 45:21: Their murderous mates were unmasked by research and science that took sacrifice and labor. 
 45:26: Above all, it took money. 
 45:29: These two remaining tortures afflict a soul because we still don't know exactly what their causes are. 
 45:35: The fight against cancer goes grimly and bravely on under good national organizations which have raised millions, but as yet no constant national defense against infantile paralysis has been mustered. 
 45:48: To do that now is the purpose of this drive. 
 45:51: Two things are necessary, and both require money. 
 45:54: One is to track this merciless killer and crippler to his hiding place and wipe him off the earth. 
 46:00: The other is to salvage the human wreckage he leaves behind him. 
 46:05: Infantile paralysis is not like other diseases which either kill or are cured. 
 46:09: It is more like some mythical dragon that rushes through a village maiming and tearing and crushing the bodies of innocent children. 
 46:16: The doctors have not completely controlled it, but they know enough to fight it. 
 46:21: If in your community there can be provided the organization, the money, and the equipment to do that, these exist in far too few places. 
 46:29: They are necessary for the protection of your home and your neighbor's home. 
 46:33: Since it is for you and yours, you cannot withhold your help, and you can help by joining the march of dimes. 
 46:40: Send a dime to the president at the White House. 
 46:43: I thank you. 
 46:52: And our thanks to you, Tyrone Power. 
 46:55: The March of Dimes program moves along now with a song sung by a name that is synonymous with radio, a fine singer, a pleasing personality, and he certainly wears his clothes well, Frank Parker. 
 47:21: And It brings like the sound of music so. 
 47:29: It brings back a. 
 47:35: It brings back a I'm with you once more. 
 47:43: Fall under the stars. 
 47:46: And down by the shore. 
 47:49: Orchest And even the palms seemed to be swaying. 
 47:58: When Just passed all and. 
 48:09: Except one that. 
 48:12: clutches my heart, and there we are. 
 48:20: And Never too But what moments divine what rapture. 
 48:32: clouds came along to disperse the joys we had tasted. 
 48:37: And now when I hear people pass the chance that was wasted. 
 48:44: I know but The love that was I. 
 48:59: I let it sleep like a high. 
 49:19: the stars are there. 
 49:23: Turbo you you whisper. 
 49:36: Oh what heaven. 
 49:40: When they begin In When Thank you, Frank. 
 50:11: I've begun to be glad not to be gone when you began to begin. 
 50:15: Is that double talk? 
 50:16: Gosh, what a voice that Parker has. 
 50:18: What a smile. 
 50:19: What a physique. 
 50:20: What a son-in-law he's made. 
 50:22: But I'd better forget about trying to get rid of my girls because here comes that kid everybody wants to get rid of Fannie Brice's baby stoks. 
 50:36: Tonight Daddy Snooks played by Hanley Stafford, is in a bad way. 
 50:41: He went to a stag affair at his lodge last night and is now trying to recover from the horrible aftereffects of the Wassail ball. 
 50:49: He is resting in his study as baby Snooks enters. 
 50:52: Let's hear you groan, Daddy. 
 50:54: Oh my head. 
 50:57: Oh. 
 51:01: Oh, you're here. 
 51:03: I go away. 
 51:04: Daddy's trying to rest. 
 51:06: And what are you laughing at? 
 51:08: Because you're wearing that funny hat. 
 51:11: That's not a funny hat. 
 51:12: It's an ice bag. 
 51:13: It looks like a funny hat. 
 51:15: Well, it's not. 
 51:16: Only crazy people wear funny hats. 
 51:19: Yes, and the thing on my head is an ice bag. 
 51:23: Are you hot, Daddy? 
 51:25: No, I'm not hot. 
 51:26: I've got chills from my ice bag. 
 51:29: No, I've got chills because I have a fever. 
 51:32: My temperature is high, so my resistance is low, and when my body heat rises, it makes me feel cold when I'm really very warm. 
 51:40: Shall I get you a funny hat, Daddy? 
 51:44: I don't want any funny hats, and leave me alone. 
 51:46: My head is splitting. 
 51:48: 00, why is your head splitting, daddy? 
 51:52: Oh, because, because I worked too late in the office last night. 
 51:56: Oh. 
 51:58: How was the smoker, daddy? 
 52:02: All right, you little snooper. 
 52:03: So I went to a smoker and don't ask me to tell you what a smoker is and don't bother me at all. 
 52:07: Just get out of here. 
 52:09: All right. 
 52:09: 000, my stomach. 
 52:13: Am I sick. 
 52:15: Oh, what do you want? 
 52:18: How'd you get sick? 
 52:20: Well, at this party last night, there was so much smoke that it got into my lungs and caused this headache. 
 52:26: Now, do you know what's the matter with me? 
 52:28: Mhm. 
 52:29: You got a hangover. 
 52:32: Looks, what are you saying? 
 52:34: That's what Mommy said on the phone. 
 52:37: Oh, she did, big blabbermouth. 
 52:41: Huh? 
 52:42: Nothing. 
 52:42: Go away and let me get some sleep. 
 52:44: Oh, don't do that. 
 52:50: Do I, Daddy. 
 52:52: Yell in my ear like that, yell in my ear. 
 52:54: , what are you doing to me? 
 52:59: You told me to ye in your ear. 
 53:01: Oh, Snooks, please leave me alone for a half hour. 
 53:05: Just one half hour, please. 
 53:07: All right. 
 53:09: Daddy. 
 53:10: Oh, now, what is it? 
 53:12: Where did you go last night? 
 53:15: To my lodge. 
 53:15: It was our annual smoker. 
 53:17: Did you take Mommy? 
 53:18: No. 
 53:19: Why? 
 53:20: Because no women are allowed there, only elks. 
 53:26: Why did you go? 
 53:28: Because I'm an elk. 
 53:30: I said I'm an elk. 
 53:33: What are you hollering about. 
 53:34: But I think you're crazy. 
 53:37: What's crazy about my being an elf? 
 53:40: A lot of people are elves. 
 53:43: My boss is not only an elk, but he's a lion and a moose and an eagle. 
 53:48: How much does it cost to see him? 
 53:51: It doesn't cost anything. 
 53:53: Those are the lodges that he belongs to. 
 53:55: Now run along and let Daddy's headache get better. 
 53:58: I'll go to buy me an ice cream cone. 
 54:01: You can't have any ice cream cones. 
 54:04: don't do that. 
 54:06: Don't jar my head. 
 54:07: I want an ice cream cone. 
 54:09: No, I can't afford it. 
 54:11: I worked too hard for my money. 
 54:13: Ain't you rich, Daddy? 
 54:15: No, I'm not rich. 
 54:17: That is not in cash. 
 54:19: I'm rich in other things, I guess. 
 54:21: Oh, my head. 
 54:23: Why are you rich in Daddy? 
 54:25: Oh, well, I, I have your mother and you. 
 54:29: And your baby sister, I place a great value on all of you. 
 54:32: How much? 
 54:33: Oh, I don't know. 
 54:35: I guess I rate you at a million dollars and your mother at a million dollars, and the baby at $500,000. 
 54:43: I, what? 
 54:43: Sell a baby and buy me an ice cream cone. 
 54:51: You listen to me, Snooks. 
 54:53: You're old enough to learn not to ask for so many things, but to give a little more. 
 54:58: Give a lot, Daddy. 
 54:59: Well, for instance, you have a lot of toys. 
 55:01: Only last month you got that great big doll for presents. 
 55:04: You mean the one that Uncle Louie sent me? 
 55:07: Yes, and that poor little Smith girl down the street has no toys and no Uncle Louie to send her any. 
 55:12: Mhm. 
 55:13: Now, wouldn't you like to give her that doll? 
 55:15: Nah, well, what would you like to give him, Uncle Louis? 
 55:21: Snooks. 
 55:23: Oh, I'm afraid you're not imbued with the spirit of charity, Snooks. 
 55:26: I want you to grow up to be loved by everybody. 
 55:29: Be kind and generous. 
 55:31: You'll be much happier too. 
 55:33: You'll learn what a wonderful thrill there is in giving, much greater than receiving. 
 55:38: Do you know why I'm telling you all these things? 
 55:41: Why? 
 55:42: Cause you don't want to buy me an icing cone. 
 55:46: Now that's not it at all. 
 55:47: I thought maybe you'd remember that Monday is my birthday and you might buy me a little present. 
 55:54: All right. 
 55:55: Daddy, would you like me to buy a chocolate cake? 
 55:58: No, no. 
 56:00: With what? 
 56:00: Oh, stop it. 
 56:03: Oh, I'm sick. 
 56:04: Snooks, don't, don't mention food. 
 56:06: Well, what shall I buy you, Daddy? 
 56:08: No, anything, anything. 
 56:09: Go away now. 
 56:09: Let me pull myself together. 
 56:11: All right, I see how much money I got my little bit of people with you back. 
 56:15: Yes, yes. 
 56:16: Oh, thank heaven. 
 56:19: Now maybe I'll rest. 
 56:22: Oh, snooks, what's all that noise? 
 56:25: the key to my bank and I gotta break it up. 
 56:28: Oh, don't do it now, please. 
 56:33: I got it open, Daddy. 
 56:34: Well, that's good. 
 56:35: Now leave me alone. 
 56:36: All right. 
 56:38: You know what I'm gonna buy you for your birthday? 
 56:40: No, what? 
 56:42: A new watch. 
 56:43: Oh, that's silly. 
 56:44: I've already got a very fine watch. 
 56:47: No, you ain't, Daddy. 
 56:49: Now, why do you say that? 
 56:51: But I guess you need to break open my bank. 
 56:53: What, you little. 
 57:08: That was swelling. 
 57:09: Now, young lady, I'd like a word with you. 
 57:12: Yes, you, come over here, snooks. 
 57:14: All right. 
 57:15: You understand the purpose of this program? 
 57:17: We're giving here tonight, don't you? 
 57:19: Are you sure? 
 57:21: Well, what is it? 
 57:22: I don't know. 
 57:24: I thought so. 
 57:24: Well, we're trying to get everybody in this whole country to contribute dimes. 
 57:30: To help a lot of poor, unfortunate sick children, snooks. 
 57:33: Oh, Mr. 
 57:34: Cante, yes. 
 57:36: Did you just hear me bust open my bank? 
 57:39: Yes, you're going to buy daddy a watch for his birthday, aren't you, Snooky? 
 57:44: Oh no, I ain't. 
 57:47: No, well, what are you going to do with the money? 
 57:49: Here, you can have it. 
 57:55: Well, baby snooks, that's the nicest gesture I've ever seen. 
 57:59: Thank you so much. 
 58:00: And now. 
 58:08: Thank you, Fannie Brice and Stanley Stafford. 
 58:11: At this time, I also wish to say thanks to Hollywood and its stars who came here tonight to shine their brightest, that others might be saved from the darkness of the dread disease infantile paralysis. 
 58:23: Thanks also to General Hugh S. 
 58:25: Johnson for his inspiring message, and I do my hat to Vic Knight for a grand producing job. 
 58:40: It's been nice to spend this hour with you. 
 58:44: We've asked for your help. 
 58:47: And we know you'll come through. 
 58:50: We've made it clear exactly how we feel. 
 58:55: And we know that you feel that way too. 
 58:59: So look, let's send our dime. 
 59:03: To the president. 
 59:05: And you may rest assured. 
 59:09: That every cent will help some kid who deserves to get rid of pain and sorrow too. 
 59:20: Oh my. 
 59:23: Oh. 
 59:26: Thank you. 
 59:38: The March of Dimes program has originated in Hollywood. 
 59:42: Don't forget to send your dime to President Roosevelt, the White House, Washington DC. 
 59:50: This program, March of Dimes was presented in connection with the nationwide fight against infantile paralysis and came to you through the National Broadcasting Company.